Ever meet someone determined to self-diagnose their personal problems and you are like: There's nothing wrong with you. Their problem is that they were set up to fail by whatever circumstances they had to deal with. So that left them vulnerable and falling through the cracks to grasp at anyone willing to catch them. That doesn't mean they are crazy.
Believe me I know from experience. Luckily I had a Mom will willing to pay my bills otherwise I would be homeless like my roommate who has nobody else to help him get back on his feet. Family in another state refuse to help him. I knew him for months at my hotel as a security guard. He was a gentleman, protective of me, and reponsible person I never complained about at work. Yes, he took liberties and got caught in the Presidential Suite by the couple still in their wedding clothes I had to move into a Governor Suite with humble apologies that someone was having a party in their room. After he lost his job, he stayed with friends who were homeless living in hotel rooms and/or drug addicts who eventually kicked him out. He is learning that when you hang around the bad kids, you eventually become the bad kid. He did hold a job for three weeks before getting fired for using a racial slur.
People keep telling me to kick him out. He is more a burden than a blessing. He does help around the house and I know how hard it is to get a job when jobless. Three jobs since he graduated high school a couple years ago and still learning to be an adult. His girlfriend's dog and cat are still here two months later when I said 1 week. His girlfriend is a complete train wreck who can't pull herself together. How is she going to help him? He is trying to help her and I try to explain he can't help her. She has dealt with so much trauma he can't fix no matter how good he is to her. If she can't trust herself, she will never trust him. He can't fix her emotional probelms. I wish he would just let go of her. But he is in love, he cares for her and wants me to like her too (not happening). I have my limits on kindness that he needs to understand. I fear what will happen to him if I do kick him out. He called me cause he had no place to go. I offered months ago when I discovered he was living in a hotel with another coworker who was living in his truck that if he needed a place to crash he could stay with me. I thought he could get a job, get an apartment, and move out within a couple months. That didn't happen. I don't know what to do anymore. When he arrived I was a complete mess with migraines and stress from being broke. Looking for a job for a year is very stressful. Just being around me, he changed me to be more aware of my house that was pig sty from working overnights and tired all the time. You could say he woke up Sleeping Beauty. Whenever he leaves, I will miss him.
Roommate had tried all night to contact his girlfriend. He had a panic attack and had to call the police who gave him a card for a crisis center. I asked about the scratches on his arms, did the dog do that. He had been cutting himself during his panic attack. Next he started tossing her things into the backyard, including the pets. He is tired of these games. Then he started crying and I tried to comfort him. After a while he calmed down and thought he overreacted. I pointed out my neighbors can call animal control on me and get cited for animal abuse so they need to come in before it gets hot outside. In the early morning, it was cool. He brings in the animals and her stuff too. I go to bed. When I wake up I heard him talking to the crisis center. He is not handling this "I need space" very well. He's heart broken and I can't fix it. Maybe he is starting to see the manipulator I see. She's using him and using me. When people start pulling away, they don't come back. But roommate stops me from negative talk. And at the end of the day, girlfriend shows up. Roommate apologizes for blowing up her phone. Phone was dead, she was working, no signal, whatever the excuse of the day is. Oh, today is a new excuse: She had a bad day so made up. I swear they keep breaking up and making up that it is becoming ridiculous.
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