Happy New Year

Happy New Year Everybody. I'm going to bed.

Movie

Got up to the phone ringing hoping it was my job interview person calling to tell me I got a new job. No, it was my sister wanting to take me to a movie. Well, laundry and putting away the rest of my xmas decore can wait.

Saw The Muppets movie. Packed full from a daycare center. Nephew so worried it would be scary enjoyed himself. Then went to Walmart. Nephew and I looked for slippers to find 2 styles and he didn't like either one. Ok met with sister and niece. Saw a Subway and since I didn't get any food at movie (sister said no popcorn), I sat there. Niece came with me and let her have a bag of chips and a drink. Nephew wanted my sister but didn't want to walk, so sat with us.

Offered nephew a snack (it is mid afternoon) and he couldn't decide so got him nothing. Niece enjoyed her snack and nephew is bored and doesn't like the high stool niece chose to sit at. I share my chips and pop (but keep sandwich to myself). Nephew asks if pop and chips were for him. No, they are mine, I am sharing with him. Once chips are gone he is bored again. Then he will have to be bored until my sister returns. Assure niece that her Mommy knows exactly where we are. Then, I spot my sister at the register. Help nephew down and guide him to his Mommy.

So sister gets checked out and head for the car. Sister is upset at nephew when he announces we broke a rule. This is news to me. Nephew wasn't suppose to have pop. Sorry. Even worse my nephew thinks I only eat junk food and HE should only eat junk food too. I demonstrated my wide food choices when I fed him supper last night. Xmas makes me have many goodies not there year around. Get home and Aunt from Omaha is desperate like trapped rat to talk to somebody, anybody, while staying at my dull Mom's apartment. So talk to Aunt and she is disturbed we didn't invite her to see the movie. Sorry, we didn't think she wanted to see a kids movie. Tell her will see her tomorrow and she wants more time with me. She needs something to do. Ok. Have to take down Mom's xmas decorations tomorrow too since Aunt can't handle that.

Today's events

Sampled some pretzels my coworker gave me and they tasted so bad I choked. Expiration date was April 2011. That would explain it. I thought she said she just bought them for xmas, but I guess I heard her wrong. I tossed them in the garbage. I know my Mom would freak out over tossing food away, but I refuse to keep what I can't handle eating. Mom will never know.

Spent the evening babysitting nephew while sister and niece went to a movie. Baked cupcakes and a chocolate cake, then frosted it all. Watched xmas features and read xmas stories. Read 12 Days of Xmas wrongly: 6 Jordans a laying, 5 Mommy rings, 4 Daddy birds, 3 Niece hens, 2 Nephew doves, and a partridge in a pear tree. Nephew insisted I read it right and I began: A Precious in a Pear Tree. Nephew took the book away and picked another. He insisted I sing the Frosty story. Yeah, I'm the fun aunt.

Now to bed. Tomorrow is laundry and writing on my novel. I have 2 chapters floating in my and now I need to write them down. it does no good in my head.

Excitement of the day

Got to explain to a coworker from Chicago the team sports of Hawkeyes and Cyclones advertised on our sportswear. She thought they were pro sports teams of Des Moines. Sorry we lack pro sports teams (at least ones that stick around).They are Iowa universities' mascots, we explained. She asks whose teams were better. I said it depended on the point of view of the person you are asking. We also noticed Nebraska Cornhuskers shirts/sweatpants also on the racks. Isn't that sacrilege in Iowa? 

Celebrating christmas

Woke up to Frodo pawing my face as usual. Realized Precious left me a gift, he vomited on my comforter. Frodo's nose in my face was his gift to me. Kitties got cat toys and cat treats from Santa and a can of tuna from me. I got a candy cane from Santa, I'm happy.

My Mom arrived an hour early than I said to come, to help prepare food. Very glad she did. Then after my brother showed up my Mom goes through the narrow aisle beside the dining room table instead of wide aisle, trips over a chair leg and goes kerplunk hitting her head of the wall and knocking over figurines on a display case. Brother picked Mom up off the floor and I got an ice pack. Asked her if we need the emergency room. No, just in pain. Ok, but no sleeping or we will call 911. She stayed awake, others slept.

Had lovely xmas dinner with too much food. Got dishes in dishwasher and then opened gifts. Then it was need a screwdriver, need scissors, need batteries, open this aunt Jordan, putting the toliet lid down to keep Precious out of toliet, turning bathroom and bedroom lights off, and I neglected to turn on the dishwasher until mid afternoon. Even worse, left all the food out. Sorry I was heavily distracted getting things, it didn't occur to me. And for record no one else thought of putting the food away either. Next time food is put away and dishwasher turned on before presents.

Niece and nephew were very eager to open presents. So eager they almost opened other people's presents, but I made them give the gift to the proper person. Nephew started unwrapping before they all were sorted so made him stop and sort out the gifts first. Sister's cat gift was given to my brother-in-law to open. One for a faraway niece (I have 4 nieces and 1 nephew) remains wrapped under the tree. Will give to her Saturday.

Brother from Fairfield is spending the night and leaving tomorrow. Made cinnamon rolls for our breakfast. Well hope you al had a wondeful Christmas.

Santa is Coming

News says Santa is here, everybody to bed!!!! Merry Christmas.

Tonight's adventure

Ok, so I work my little 5 hr shift. As I walk into the backroom to clock out, my sweater bumps a thumbtack off a bulletin board. It flies across me and naturally I go to pick it up since nobody was that suprise on their shoe. The thumbtack stops bouncing in front of a manager's office. She is so happy see me.

"Jordan", she squeals. We had a bunch of call ins and we need extra help, would you like to stay. Not really, but I stop myself before the words escape my lips and verbally answer "Sure". Hey, I need money. So my 5 little hours become 10 long hours, and yes breaks were added. The crowd never slowed down and while working I am wondering when my niece's church program I said might come is. Was it tonight or tomorrow, or yesterday? I'll call sister tomorrow.

So on with my extra hours and cookies I will not be baking tonight. Manager says my time I'm suppose to leave can start my lunch break. I have no lunch, I was expecting to leave. I hope I don't pass out from starvation before the end of my new shift. I have no money for the candy machine for snack chips. My buddy is taking her break when I I sit down. She offers me Cheetos and Easy Mac and cheese so I don't faint from hunger. So nice her. Later someone brought cookies so had a cookie on my other break.

Make it to the end of my new shift very sleepy and disorganized when people ask me questions. As I walk from my area I announce to coworkers I am running away, not staying til midnight. Then went grocery shopping and now home with a Precious on my lap upset I'm typing instead of petting him. Ah, bed is calling me. Must answer.

Tonight I said to coworkers I will be cleaning my apartment for xmas dinner tomorrow so don't call if you catch the flu. I am not coming. To bed.

Night Before Christmas retold

The Night Before Catsmas
By: Jordan Harvey

It was the night before Catsmas and all through the apartment
No mice were stirring, not even in the toy department;
The stockings were hung on the bookshelf with care
In hopes that Santy Paws would soon be there
The kitties were nestled, all snug in their beds
While visions of catnip danced in their heads.

And Precious in his tower and Frodo in mama’s bed
Had settled down after being fed;
When all of a sudden there popped such a spark
Precious jumped up to find it was all dark
A streetlight went out and trees covered in ice
No longer dimly sparkled, which was very nice.

The moonlight upon the new fallen snow
Covered up the paw prints where dogs like to go;
When what to my wondering cat eyes should appear
But a miniature sleigh and eight tiny catdeer
With a little furry driver so quick with his claws
I knew we were getting a visit from Santa Paws.

More rapid than chasing eagles his coursers they came
And he mewed and growled and called them by name
Now Snowball, Now Princess, Now Fluffy and Jingles
On Patches, On Smokey, On Sassy and Jangles
To the top of the porch, To the top of the wall
Now dash away, dash away, dash away all.

As dry leaves that before the wind devil fly
When they meet with an obstacle mount to the sky
So up to the balcony, the coursers they flew
With a sleigh full of toys and Santy Paws too.

And then, in a twinkling I heard down low
The prancing and clawing of each little toe;
As I drew in my head and was turning around
In the door Santa Paws came with a bound.

He was dressed all in fur from his head to his foot
And his clothes were tarnished with smoke and soot;
A bundle of toys he had flung on his back
And he looked like a shoplifter opening his sack
His eyes, how they glowed, his ears how hairy
His cheeks were like walnuts, his nose like a cherry.

His little droll little mouth was drawn up like a bow
And his wispy whiskers were as white as the snow;
The cold air his jaws held tight in his teeth
And his breath encircled his head like a wreath
He had a broad furry face and a round belly
That shook when he purred like a bowl of jelly.

He was chubby and plump, a right jolly old cat
And laughed when I saw him right off the bat;
A wink of his eye and twist of his head
Soon gave me the know that I had nothing to dread
He meowed no words but went straight to work
And filled all our stockings and turned with a jerk.

And laying a claw aside of his nose
And giving a nod, out the door he rose;
He sprang to his sleigh, to his team gave a yowl
And away they all flew as if they heard a wolf howl
But I heard him exclaim before he drove out of sight
Meowy Catsmas to all and to all a good night.

Battle of Phony Coupons Continues

Somebody got an unhappy customer with a phony coupon (Duh) who was defensive and humilated and angry we dared tell said customer their coupon was not valid. How dare we not accept their coupon they got off the internet (Oh sure, we don't mine loosing hundreds or even thousands of dollars because of these phony coupons). How was said person suppose to know it wasn't a real coupon? Well, sweetheart, unless I work for the company itself, I don't know which internet coupons are real and which are fake either (actually they're photoshopped from real ones expired 6 months ago and some are created by coupon seller). But then, I don't accuse people of being rude and degrading just because I didn't get my way either. So there.

Oh yeah, we fixed the problem. We apologize for the customer's ignorance and direct them to the coupons they are actually out there. Anything to make a customer happy and shop some more. And if people want "real" coupons, they are free from store websites and newspaper ads. Once I checked out of the grocery store and the clerk opened her ad to find me a coupon. She typed in a coupon code for eggs, even though I didn't buy eggs (I wasn't about to argue with her).
 

Another day being me

Come home from work, change clothes, and make salmon patties. Kitties love the salmon water squeezed out of the can. I go to flip the pattied to realize I forgot to turn on the stove. Ba da dum. Another day being me. Tomorrow's posting will include wrapping presents, laundry, baking pies and cookies, and grocery shopping.

So war in Iraq is over, now what?

Happy Xmas by john Lennon

War is over, if you want it, war is over now. So this is xmas, and what have u done, another year over, and a new 1 just begun. And so this is xmas, I hope u had fun, the near and the dear ones, the old and the young. A very merry xmas, and a happy new year, let's hope it's a good one, w/out any fear.

And so this is xmas, 4 weak and 4 strong, the rich and the poor ones, the wrong is so strong. And so happy xmas, 4 black and 4 white, 4 yellow and 4 red ones, let's stop all the fight. A very merry xmas, and happy new year, let's hope it's a good 1, w/out any fear. War is over, if u want it, war is over now.

New scam

Got a weird email stating a confirmation for a airline ticket w/attachment to print the ticket. I didn't buy any ticket and not opening any attachment. 1st thought was virus so looked up on an airline flight tracker site to see if flight exists. It does, from Florida to Brazil. My email said no departure city and arrived in Los Angeles. So emailed the airline to let know of this scam. In case they didn't know. Anyone else get this email?

No baking today

No baking tonight. I read a magazine and cuddled with cats.

Between cuddles the cats chased each other around the apartment tonight. Then when one jumped up on the recliner chair, it slumped down and a foot rest popped up with a loud thud. Naturally they had to investigate the hole under the chair. It wasn't there before. Then jumped on each other again.

Now ready for bed. Cuddling is such hard work.

Bake or rest

To bake or not to bake. That is the question. I baked yesterday. Shall I rest tonight.

Cats resting on my lap for so long I can't feel my feet. And yet, they demand petting when my arms get tired. Such neglected kitties.

Song for the cats

‎2...3...4. Christmas, Christmas, time is near. Time for toys and time for cheer. We've been good, but we can't last. Hurry Christmas. Hurry Fast. Want a plane that loops the loop. Me, I want a hula hoop. We can hardly stand the wait. Please Christmas Don't Be Late.

Miss Manners Question

Miss Manners Question: Why do some people who receive gifts never say thank you and yet, people still give gifts to these people.

Miss Manners Answer: People who don't say thank you are rude and why they keep receiving gifts is beyond Miss Manners understanding.

My Answer: Some of us believe a gift with strings attached is not a gift at all. And some of us give to the ungrateful simply cause giving is "from the heart" or simply "from obligation". I tend to include all of a group (coworkers, relatives, friends, etc.) and not pick and choose from the pool of people who say Thank You when making my gift/card list every year.

Excitement of the day

Had a lady leave her keys in her cart and her cart was taken by someone else. Eventually found and turned in. Another lady left her purse in her cart and someone else had taken it. I called customer service and they said it was already turned in.

Had a coworker giving extra discount than we were suppose to in order to sell those store credit card applications. The ploy was working. Apparently said person found a store card member's coupon so was using that along with the normal discount. I was inclined to squeal since that is most unfair to the rest of us offering the normal discount. Another coworker said not to tell and just let said person get into trouble on their own. The cash register does record everything we do on it. Well, other coworker was miffed and squealed to a manager. Said person disappeared, though did see them walking by with light bulbs. Must had person change light bulbs.

Later at home:
Poor cat Precious tries so hard to cuddle with me. First I turned around I bumped him, then almost stepped on his paw, and next I fluff the blanket to lay over my legs and bopped him in the face. Poor baby.

Why do cats never desire to go outside, until I shut the door. Well, cats are meowing for attention so better get off the computer.

Did my best

Did my best stretching out my sweater a few inches. Then watched Love Actually. Then made Almond Bark Pretzels. Next watched Muppets Christmas Carol. Never understood why Nephew Fred is not in the Future Scenes. Perhaps he is indirectly. Someone had to pay for his tombstone or else you get an unmarked grave like the great Mozart. Now off to bed. Gotta work tomorrow. Bills need paying.

Project of the day

Today I will stretching a sweater. Washed and dried a brand new knee length sweater and now it just covers my tushy. Does wool shrink that much? I know acrylic doesn't. Here's hoping.

Debate

Friend said this:
Women will never be equal to men until they can walk down the street with a bald head and a beer gut, and still think they are sexy.

My reply:
And men will never be equal to women until they walk down the street in 4 inch heels and a dress and know they are sexy.

Who wins the debate? Comment please.

Another poem for ya

I was going through my old poems in my poetry notebook looking for an empty page for my Halloween poem and thought to share this.

Untitled
written Spring 2002

Many people tell me
every day what is
As if they are experts
in this reality called life

I see reality every day
in front of my face
Many people forget
the great dream called what if

Halloween poem

Deleting old emails I found this poem I wrote to my friends for Halloween.

Every girl wants to be a princess
Every boy wants to be a punk
Every cat must have its yowl and every dog his howl
Every ghost tries to blend in with the living
Every vampire must bite his jawbreaker
Every devil must light his jack-o-latern
Every mother must take a picture of her kids
The moon shines bright, the stars twinkle
Don't be scared of those disguies, It's Halloween night

Have a great Halloween. Later, Jordan.

Rain in December

Rain in December, that would make a good title for something. Yes, it is raining today instead of snowing. I planned to do laundry to wash my new clothes, but don't want to go out in the rain. Weather man said it is suppose to alter into ice and snow this evening. Good thing I worked this morning and safe at home. Watching St Elmo's Fire on TV. I love that movie. Watched ice skating earlier. Frodo is eating cheese powder off my fingers. Typical day for me.

PS. It is still raining at 10 PM. Do laundry tomorrow. After St Elmo's Fire, I watched a Harry Poter marathon until bedtime. Yes, I am a movie buff.

Hi I'm Jordan, I'm a shopaholic

Finally get an email of the coupon I have been waiting for. Yesterday's email said in store coupons are in the mail so only gave a coupon code to use online. If I actually got my coupons in the mail that customers got last week, I wouldn't need email coupons since they are essentially the same coupon. SO print off the coupon guessing coupons won't come in the mail today either. Guess what, coupon's in the mail. It makes me a very bad sales clerk not knowing what coupons are out there.

Toss aside email coupon I no longer need. Getting extra employee discount this week so will be going berserk today and don't need to shop the rest of the year. Get new tank tops to go with my sweaters since this Indian Summer seems to be never ending. Too hot standing next to a running computer in long sleeves. Return a gift someone else also got my nephew and get additives to his grand present instead. Get lotion and soap set for Mom. Forgot the gift cards for nieces (it wasn't on the list) but can get those tomorrow. Grab nail dryer and electric nail file for myself. Manicuring tonight. Cringe at the total given at the register.  But I don't want to put anything back.

Get home and soak fingers for my manicure. Try 4 sets of batteries (8 total) that work in other things and the electric nail file doesn't work. And I prayed I would not be electrocuted using scissors to remove batteries. Practically destory the paint on the nail dryer trying to open and shut the battery case trying 4 sets of batteries to make that thing work. 4th time batteries worked. Painted nails deep purple and used regular manual nale file.

Cats get under the tree and try to take a photo. Camera batteries dead so change them once to make that work. Excuse me, but don't you think new batteries should work? Cats remain still as change batteries and get my picture.

Now I can relax. Nails dry and everything is right in the world.

Today's adventure

Got off work, grocery shopped, prepare supper, sneeze, reach for a Kleenex to realize I left them at work. When supper done cooking, I'll go back to work for my tissues. Don't work tomorrow and I want them back.

Read this in the paper today:
A salesperson tells, a good salesperson explains, and a great salesperson demonstrates.

Or a salesperson knows how to read labels on products and great salesperson buys the products and can give a report to the customer.

Also read in the paper today:
The person who knows "how" will always have a job.
The person who know "why" will always be his boss. Diane Rawitch.

Unless u r me of course. I know everything and still lost a lost a job.

Tree up

Got the tree up today. Finished setting out the xmas village last night. I have far too many decorations, but don't want to get rid of anything. Anyone else sing xmas carols while putting up decorations? I love to sing, but cats don't appreciate it. Sister's cat once loved listening to me sing. She would lay down on the floor near my feet and purr. My cats leave the room.

Saw a new dart gun at my store yesterday. It shoots large marshmellows.
Mom would say: What a big waste of food.
I say: Tossing marshmellows with your hands is cheaper.

Well, nothing else to say. Later.

Black Friday

Should be called Black and Blue Friday: Fist fights at Altoona Walmart, gun shots at Valley West Mall.  Customers commented how highly organized our store compared the mess at other stores. Yes, I said, we have a highly organized manager.

Survived another Black Friday. I'm ready for bed.

Happy Thanksgiving

Happy Thanksgiving Everybody. Mine will be at Mom's retirement home dining room (equal to 5 star restaurant with a bunch of old people. Gave cats Turkey and Gravy cat food this morning. Have a great day.

Christmas letter 2011

Merry Christmas to all my family and friends. My year started with snow, lots of snow, oodles of snow. Ok, maybe exaggerating. New year began at Mom’s retirement home room celebrating our extended family Christmas with Mom’s side of the family. Nephew enjoyed learning about Christmas presents. In fact, Nephew and Niece think Christmas should be every day. Cousins blessed our family with their new baby boy. Soon Niece and Nephw had a musical concert at school.  Niece was ready to sleep at school, but we explain her bed and snack are at home. Taught Nephew all about coloring Easter eggs and later had Easter dinner with sister’s family. The world ended on May 21, 2011 according to some preacher studying the scriptures. Funny, the world looks the same to me. Spring pushed winter aside and I took Mom to her side of the family cemetery in Dexter. Sister already covered Dad’s grave so I went to visit Dad by myself.  Niece’s dance recital ended up on same day as another niece’s recital, but can’t be at two places at once. Requested to do Niece’s bun, being former ballerina myself, so attended hers.  Other niece can do her own hair pieces.  Niece was a Kitten Who Lost Her Mitten. Then she was the Lion King tapping to Hakuna Matata.

Thinking of a fun outdoor activity to do with Niece and Nephew while trying to learn to ride bikes, I decided on skateboarding. Before teaching them, I had to relearn myself.  Nephew learned the balancing act on the bike and loves riding along with Daddy. Went to Bon Jovi concert with brother-in-law as a thank you for babysitting the kids so much. Then cat-sat sister's cat Sammie while brother-in-law did a faraway marathon. Had excitement training an intern at work. I love training people. Took Niece and Nephew to zoo to see a new dinosaur exhibit. Kids were scared dinosaurs would eat them and I had to explain they are not real animals. Had an overnight with Niece and Nephew reading Christmas bedtime stories in the middle of summer.  Nephew is eager to pet Precious and Frodo so we practiced nice petting. Went to amusement park Adventureland with Brother-in-law, Niece, and Nephew. Summer heat came to soon and I attended Aunt’s 70^th birthday party at another Aunt and Uncle's house. Later in the summer I took Niece and Nephew to the beach at Gray‘s Lake. Kids need to learn that getting dirty is fun. Spent 4^th of July with sister’s family and Mom watching a big parade in Urbandale and watching fireworks at the Urbandale library. I introduced Niece and Nephew to funnel cake at the park after the parade. I’m a bad, bad aunt.

Soon, friends had their new addition Emma Katherine. I got new furniture delivered that the cats approve of, a couch and recliner. Doesn’t match the cat fur, but then the old furniture didn’t either. In honor of other niece’s visit to sister's house, we went bowling and again to Adventureland. Rode a water ride about 4 times before going home soaking wet. Attended the big family reunion with Mom’s side at her cousin’s house. We celebrated Nephew’s 7^th birthday at sister's house with family. Later in the summer, took Niece and Nephew to my apartment pool. Discovered Nephew is tall enough to touch the bottom of the pool, a major accomplishment. But summer doesn’t last forever and I took Niece and Nephew back to school shopping. Cousin’s daughter got married in Las Vegas to her man Jeff. They had a reception at Principal Park’s club room with the extended family. Autumn came and during Aunt’s visit to Des Moines we went to the Botanical Center and Chinese Garden down the street. Attended Niece’s 8^th birthday party at a pizza place with arcade and go carts.  Niece never met a doll she didn’t like. Next, Thanksgiving came quicker than we were ready. Had dinner at Mom’s retirement home dining room. It is like a 5 star restaurant there. Then Black Friday rushed by and glad it won’t be back for another year.

Big family Christmas with Mom’s side will be at her retirement home reception room again, people rather like it. Hopefully next year will be just as good as this one. Merry Christmas and Happy Meow Year

Love Always

Jordan

Precious

Frodo

Niece's birthday party

Got up at 3:30 AM to get to work by 6 AM. Afterwards started xmas shopping, and few things for me. Picked up mama and arrived at pizza place.What a pizza place! Bumper cars, go carts, arcade, minature golf, bowling in the dark. Niece was in her dance leotard and tap shoes hugging her daddy. Sister was picking up the cake and had her party dress in her car. Brother-in-law's parents arrive and niece has to rearrange her presents and shake them to figure out what they are. Tip: Don't wrap kid presents in white paper.

Sister arrives and we settle down into a lovely quiet room.Niece in her new party dress. Niece was disappointed we didn't get the party room (2 people short) with b-day hat, balloons, and b-day song by the staff.  Enjoyed the pizza buffet. Played some games. Then took pictures of the cake and gifts. Niece kept shoving nephew out of the picture.  Niece opened gifts. She never met a doll she didn't like. Nephew got a gift too, but such in a bad mood being shoved out of the picture he cried he didn't like his gift. So sister announced, he won't keep his gift and grandma said she would take it back to the store (actually give it again at Thanksgiving when in better mood). Nephew needs to show gratitude when receiving gifts.

Went back to playing games after cake and ice cream. Niece had to rearrange her unwrapped gifts. I told her to get off the floor cause she is getting her dress dirty. Naturally this gets my sister's attention and niece looks at her mommy to contradict me. Sorry, sister doesn't want niece's dress dirty either. While waiting for kids to return from games, I got bored so decided write out who gave what gifts on the b-day cards (for thank you notes). Suddenly I cough so hard I end up vomiting. OK time to go home. Mom was ready to go home too. 4 hours is enough party time for her.

Today got up early to arrive at work by 8 AM. Tried so hard not vomit again. I need to work, I need money and don't get many hours (they hired 30 people so my hours get cut). No sick time earned yet so I need to work when I can. Meet more new people. I'm the only experienced one. Apparently a coworker got sick with a cold and had an upset stomach. Sounds like she caught my bug.

Well, better bump off the cat from my lap, their favorite pet bed. Time for bed.

Thanksgiving plans

I invited my family to have Thanksgiving dinner at my place (even got new dinnerware for the occasion). They made other plans so will be spending the holiday with old people at my Mom's Retirement Home dining room. She says they have a good food durng the holidays.
Ain't life wonderful...wonderful now?

Oh why do I have to work at a place that's closed on the holidays? I miss my airport job. Eating a hamburger at the cafeteria and talking to work friends. Perhaps I'll use the new dinnerware for xmas.

Colds suck

Caught a cold, so I prepare myself to work 8 hrs today: Lotion tissues and meds. Paged for help for a customer before reaching my register. And then, I start loosing my voice checking out customers. Coworker comes in and I ask if she could hear me well or should I go home. Right now it is a little quiet but it will get noisy.  She said go home. I asked if she would call a magaer for me since I thought nobody would understand my page. Manger said me and my tissues could leave early. Bummer. I only get 2 personal days so was hoping to use them for family events.

Good thing I left, my voice got worse when I said "Hi Babies" to the cats. Down to a small whisper. Very hard to tell Precious to get down from the screen door. Took a nap. I was up past three blowing my nose last night. Invited family to Thanksgiving dinner. Nobody is volunteering for the Big dinner w/aunts, uncles, cousins, and my family. And sister is going to husband's side of the family. I can do a small meal. Let's see if anyone says yes.

Bad, bad kitty

Took to placing duct tape on the screen door to stop the Precious from scratching his claws on it. Tried spraying himwith water, but it doen't work apparently. Precious has a mind of his own and does what he wants.

Got the new phone charged up and ready to go. Called Mom to tell she can call now (and not dial my cell anymore). Sister figured out last night when my cell wasn't on that my landline must be working again. She needs babysitting so she can do a book fair (or conferences or whatever after work).

Have a cold too. Called dentist to change tomorrow's appointment to next week. I don't want to sneeze on anyone. Receptionist said I sounded stuffy. Well, cuddle time with the cats. They are starved for attention.  

Definition of torture

GOP debate discussed the definition of toture.


Jordan's definition: If any American jail would not have the nerve to waterboard their suspects (8th Amendment), I call it torture. Any other definitions out there.


 I believe the word I'm looking for is Coercion which is against US law and Geneva Convention rules.

Just another Sunday

Came to work on one side of the registers to be moved to other side so the 2 newbees (later 5) would have an experienced coworker present to help. They need help leaving the register when they have a break (customers don't know you need to leave). I think some newbees don't like paging on the PA system or call for a manager. Sometimes you just got to bite the bullet and do it. Though I wish they would stop apologizing every time they need help. That is what I am here for.

Saw an interesting pet ad in the paper.
Cats: 2 males, 1 spayed. Free to good home.
Went to Best Buy for new phone batteries and the stores don't carry much b/c each phone has its own battery (nobody can use regular batteries you can find anywhere you know). Sales clerk said Good Luck and online is the best place to get them. Any votes towards just getting a new phone from this much hassle. Online it said $20 for new batteries (plus shipping and sales tax). Maybe tomorrow, I'm doing the laundry now.

Breaker's 1st day

Today I did 1st day as breaker (give breaks to coworkers). 1st break horde of customers come so end up telling 4 customers I'm closed. Met newbees. Then breaks overlap so threw off the break schedule. I can only be at 1 register at a time. At one point when customer traffic slowed down, we had 3 coworkers on break at the same time. I bounced registers as they came back and sent another on her break. Late leaving since another horde arrives and all come to my register.


Arrive at Mom's late, and get check from her (after waiting for 5 days I asked for another check). Deposit check and while setting my purse down getting fruit, I leave it behind. I rush back to fruit to find it gone. Search nearby counters and lady in wheelchair is turning in my purse. She said it was heavy (really?). Thank her and go back to cashier. Look for batteries to go in phone. Can't find right label so will try another rechargeable battery. Look up battery on Best Buy site and yes they have it if doesn't work.


Come home and cats starved for attention and go outside. I pet them as I type all this. Call Mom to tell her her check showed up in the mail today. BTW, my 2 aunts in Missouri and Oklahoma (900 miles away) sent Thankgiving cards the day after Mom and they all came the same day. Now watching TV before going to bed in a hour. Night.

Stressful days

Found out it's Vet's Day from the big sale and huge crowds in the parking lot. And no mail toady so still waiting for Mom's check. Tomorrow plan to visit her and get another check from her. Why do I get things in the mail faster from my out of state sister than I can from my Mom across town? 4/5 days is ridiculous. The check I wrote for a credit card is going to bounce soon. Hopefully nobody stole it. I told Mom to call the bank make sure it wasn't cashed.

Then on top my stress, my cash register screen goes awry and I get another phony coupon. At least the lady took it well. She wanted it back (to try again at another register), but I said I have to give it to my manager. Apparently, one person tried different cashiers for her phony coupon. I make sure all my coworkers knew about it, especially the newbee who crooks target since they don't know what they are doing. Maybe I'm oversensitive, but I think some customers who have a dozen of one per customer coupons have been watching me with other customers before approaching. I used to work a sales floor and very observant of people watching me (shoplifters do this).

Next, come home to find my cordless phone batteries are dead so call Mom on cell. Mom said she called me to have it ring twice and hung up. Precious wants outside and scratches up the balcony screen in defiance of my uncooperative behavior.  I know when he is not just making noise because Frodo runs away when Precious is bad. He knows what's coming, the spray bottle. Precious likes to get his way and upsets me on purpose when he doesn't get it. Then runs away from the spray bottle meowing his angry meow. Your day any better?

Snow!!!

Electricity goes out in middle of night so alarm clock doesn't go off. I wake up when I'm suppose to leave. End up half hour late for work. At 7 AM, nobody really noticed. Then after 8 hours, I came home to find the cable stuck on a Spanish channel. Remote don't work. Change batteries and still don't work. Hit power button and all is ok.

Had a lady complain I short changed her on her reward coupon. I show on the coupon and her receipt the amount on her reward coupon and she is confused and doesn't understand. She got the reward coupon amount she claims she should have gotten so why is she arguing? Her daughter explains what I just said and lady still believes I'm short on the reward coupon. Finally, lady says if her daughter says everything is ok, then she must be right. Of course, I'm a liar and confuse her so much.

Anyone else laugh when a kid cries and begs their parents for a toys and the parents reply, You already have one and I'm not buying another. I hear this a lot.

Outta things to talk about.

My schedule

Last week's day off schedule.
Buy things I don't need (add to Barbie collection, niece's birthday present)
Stop at Mom's to pick up money so can pay the rent
Buy things I do need (grocery store)
Buy things the cats want (cat nip plants they eat up in half hour)
Chiroprator
Take Precious out
Too tired to do laundry, do it next day


Today's day off schedule.
Call Mom begging for money (my I have a lot of bills and only make about $800 a month)
Watch cats sleep as eat my lunch
Update timeline and index of characters on latest novel (yes got another chapter done)
Chiropractor and take out garbage on way to car
Take Precious out
Read new chapters of friend's novel he sent last week
Read book about writing novels
Not enough dirty clothes to do laundry, do it later

Exercixe for the day

Frodo has made it passed the threshold into the hallway (usually he doesn't get that far) and gave chase when tried put the harness on him to take him outside. He explored all 3 floors and finally decided to go home. So Precious and I went outside alone. Precious accepts the harness so he gets a walk.

Visiting Mom

Went to see Mom for the monthly begging of money today. Oh God when will this end? Had lovely conversation. Compared notes on Aunt from Omaha visit. Aunt commented that I actually talked a lot. Yeah, I'm a chatterbox. Too bad not everyone knows that.

Niece and nephew are doing well at school. Still don't like turning in homework in the bags. My sister puts it in their bags, they just refuse to give it to the teacher. Niece in 2nd grade is better at reading and reads to her mother instead. But when I'm there niece likes me to read because I do funny voices. My Mom didn't know what to niece for her birthday. What do you get a kid with a house full of toys and closet full of clothes? Books at her higher reading level, she has a lot of beginner books, I decided. Oh course since Mom lacks birthday paper, I will be getting her gift and wrapping it too so all she has to do is tape her card on it. Anything to help Mom.

Talked to my sister about babysitting tomorrow so she can do a book fair at her school. Of course, I would love to babysit and get back my Halloween specials. Gotta do laundry tomorrow too.

Happy Halloween

What do you call a chicken running down the street?
Lunch.

What is black and white, black and white, and green?
Penguin rolling down a hill.

Happy Halloween Everybody.

Phony coupon controversary

Lovely Saturday. Had controversary over phony coupons. One said not accept them and another said accept them to make angry customers happy. What is the point of rules, if we break them all hoping customers put Highly Satisfied on their surveys? Why don't someone put a sign on the front door that says "Rob Us", cause that is exactly what these phony coupon makers are doing. And I bet they don't do surveys and put in Highly Satisfied at our customer service. Sorry, had to get that out of my system.

How's your week?

Our excitement at work today was a small boy carrying a dart gun set, the box was about the size of the boy. He follows his mama around struggling to carry this box begging to have it. But, in the end, mama said no. Boy pounds his fists on the box screaming and crying. Mama still says no. We put it back.

I once had a mom buy a gun set (can't recall water balloons, water, or darts) and I said to the 10ish boy, Don't point that at your mom. Boy was confused, What would happen if he did. Lady says to try it and find out. Mom says he will be deep trouble.

Had a odd customer that cried she has a 15% coupon, but doesn't show it to me. It's automatic for all associates, she says (in which store?). So scan her candle and bend over to get a sack. She brashly informs me I forgot her coupon. Sorry ma'am (Am I not allowed to get a sack before giving a total?). So as she counts her change I give the usual, I'll gladly take change and it will get used. After I give her change back and drawer is closed, she takes out all the change in her purse. She announces I can't have her quarters and demands a quarter for her 2 dimes and nickel. I think she took me too literally about liking change, but I open the drawer to get a quarter for her. I have to break all the rules to make a customer happy you know.

Had a group of boys in our breakroom drawing greeting cards with construction paper. Adult there said, No gun pictures. Kid asks, Can I draw a duck. Another asks, What's a duck? Adult replied, The kind that go quack quack. IS there another definition of duck?

Ok, got a short message on one of my blogs asking why I hated them. What did they do to me? Um, let's see. Total stranger from God's knows where is asking this question. If I actually knew you, I would have answer.


Got phony coupons being spread again. Coupon from a new store is copied and photo shopped on the computer to alter it enough to scan it. These coupons have been redeemed at least a week, and now this figure this out. Finally, we can say no to a customer.

Well, let's see. Think lost some friends from my boring life and passion for saving shelter animals. Only happy stories for certain people. I'm sorry I'm not artificial and pretend my life is a fantasy that is the envy of all my friends. I sleep w/cats, have to ask my Mommy for money cause my job doesn't pay enough (and lost my good job so lucky to work at all), I'm so tired all the time it borders dysfunction, and yeah, I'm dirt poor so can't go anywhere interesting. This is some f***ing fairytale I'm living.

Well, outta news to tell.

Aunt from Omaha

Aunt from Omaha comes to visits and has to spend time with me. She stays at my Mom's place. Mom is crippled and doesn't travel well. Aunt is stir crazy bored out of her mind. They visited the other relatives and Mom complained she wore her out. Aunt has to have activity, but poor crippled Mom prefers to stay put. If you had the flu or broken leg, you wouldn't want to walk all over the city either. So for our outing Aunt insists upon. I offer to drive her to the local historic houses she hasn't seen before. Look them up on the internet.

 

Historic houses closed on Mondays so took aunt to Botanical Center (giant greenhouse and outside gardens) and she complains about all the green stuff (trees and cacti). She wants flowers. We did find some colorful flowers.

 

Then we passed a Chinese Garden down the road (so stopped) to hear aunt comment how weird it was to set in the middle of Des Moines. We do have many Asians here. She thought the pagoda house was weird too asking what do you do with a place like this. I said you can have a reception, picnic, and look at the statues. I rather liked it. Then got on the dam bridge next to Chinese garden and birds circle then diving in the water at once. Couple guys were fishing and people were walking the nearby trail.

 

Then came to my place. Aunt petted Precious once and later told him to get off the couch (which he disobeyed cause I let him on the couch). Showed Aunt pictures on my computer. She was full of questions from do the cats go outside to who move the furniture into my place. Then took Aunt back to my Mom's for supper. Very nice day too, rolled up my sleeves it was so warm. I stored away all my short sleeve shirts.

 

Went grocery shopping, I prefer to do that w/out my aunt exclaiming how my mascara costs more than my milk. She tends to do things like that. Like my Mom, she often blurts out whatever she is thinking with no edit button on how others might interpret what she is saying. I work in customer service and have a strong edit button. Customer misunderstanding you or thinking your are rude can get you fired in my line of work.  

Trying to sleep

Trying to go to sleep when this pops in my head. At 1 AM, I get out of bed to write it down.

There was once a girl from Memphis, streetwise and razor sharp, you think her every smile is meant for you. Your heart bleeds, your soul cries, cause she is no longer there.
She's singing around the world, breaking hearts at every stride.
She is my love, my essence, my reason for being the man I admire and keep her in my heart.


Is this an old song I've forgotten or did my sleepy brain just compose it?


PS.  Brain continued after I went back to bed with this:
Oh sweet girl from Memphis how you break my heart in two, repeat line.
Every time I hear your voice on the radio.
I'm left all alone with the memories of our love wrapped around my heart like a blanket around my soul. How I miss you so.
I shall die tonight, looking upon your face, from the audience.
I'll scream, I'll shout, Everybody knows your name.
My sweet girl from Memphis, repeat line.

Then I finally got to go to sleep. Does this happen to anyone else? I know if I had not written this down (I took paper and pen to bed with me the 2nd time around), I've would have forgotten the whole poem.
Ah, The Adventures of Being Me.

I voted

I voted on the People Choice Awards. Most of the movies, TV shows, and songs/videos I never seen or even heard of so I just pick anything familiar. Gotta pick your favorites, right? Power to the people.

Fabricated story

I get a post from a friend on a social networking site about a girl painting sheets with her mother's lipstick and the mother beats her to death. The girl wrote, I love you Mommy on the shet. There was even a photo of the dead girl covered in bruises and scratches.

So of course I google and search the intenet where and when this story occured. I like facts.I find a story of girl attacked from the new family dog in UK in 2002. Girl in photo looks very much like the one painting sheets with lipstick.

http://www.thesun.co.uk/sol/homepage/news/article145234.eceGirl savaged by new dog www.thesun.co.ukGIRL of two mauled by dog three days after her family gave it a home..


It is a complete lie. Shame on people who make this stuff up. It's called tabloid journalism.

Cat-Houdini

Did laundry today and the great Cat-Houdini (aka Precious) snuck out the door. He refused the harness, but in the hallway it is going on like it or not. He didn't like being trapped in the laundry room. He also didn't like the windy weather either so we stayed out 20 minutes.

Worked on my story a little. Why is coming up with ideas and plotlines so hard this time? I have 2 finished novels and 3 unfinished stories. I should be filled to the brim with ideas. Ugh. Better brush up on my mythology and fairytales. My pathetic life gives me no inspiration.

Am I that annoying?

I know I annoy people for having a passion for helping animals in shelters. I hear from friends how they or friend of theirs get pets from neighbors, friends of friends, or from a breeder when at the same time they are costing an animal inside a shelter their life. Yes, my first kitten Precious was from a friend who was eager to get rid of her kittens. She selected me before the cat even got pregnant b/c for years I wanted a cat like my sister, but didn't think I could afford it. Then Precious was dropped on my lap. My cat Frodo came from a shelter as I refused to have a kitten forced on me again.

But my passion is not shared by others who like living in their little world of house, spouse, kids, pets, and friends to ignore the world around them. I know it is my fault for caring too much. I have no house, no spouse, no kids, nor any friends to occupy my time so my pets and my novels become my hobby. My cats are so lucky to be someone who adores them, takes care of them, and would discard any person who told me to get rid of them. Animals are not decorations in my home. Sure, when I lost my job I thought of taking them to a shelter and pray they are not killed from being afraid of people (hey, you get rejected by people on our walks and you would be hestitant approaching them too). But, if I actually did that it would be giving up all hope the happy times will come back and I would be jumping off a bridge shortly after. I would never let them starve in an empty home.

I know I'm a sad story who feels so powerless and advocating for shelter animals is the only power I can find in powerless life.   

Busy days off

Have 3 days off in a row. What will I do?
Agenda:
Carve pumpkins, but first need newspaper and buy groceries while I'm at it.
Work on novel, I have ideas floating in my head, but need to put in time order and write it down.
Check want ads for any full time positions (very rare anymore).
Watch Halloween specials. Got Garfield and Legend of Sleepy Hollow done. Have Hocus Pocus and Charlie Bown left.
Can't think of anything else.

Wedding reception

Went to my cousin's daughter's wedding reception tonight. Was good to see faraway family in person again. Mostly keep in touch through the internet. At least I recognized them, when my internet-challenged Mom and sister couldn't recognize our cousins' kids very well. My Mom can't remember any of my cousins' kids names. I think the last time was saw each other was my Dad's funeral a few years ago. Weddings and funerals is when we get together now.

Another upset customer

Made customer mad when I did a store credit card application for the person ahead of her. I should have warned my clients I was going to take a long time. Yeah, and she could have moved to any 3 cash registers ready to help her at any moment she got tired of waiting too. I think people just want to complain instead of solving a problem.


Had another customer debate a wrong price, but didn't know what the correct price was (just thought it was lower than scanned). So he goes to check the price. If the scanned price is wrong, I will alter it, no problem (If we did our own price changes I bet there would be less of this problem). Meanwhile, another person wants to check out and prior customer returns while I'm helping that person. So he waits patiently for me to finish and I give him an extra discount for his patience (I do that when customers move carts out of the way so I don't have to also). I told him: It's pays off to be patient, I'm much nicer. He agreed.

PS. Didn't give the 1st paragraph lady any additional discount. 

Interesting speech

I am ringing up a customer when a lady interrupted asking if our store manager was here. Haven't seen here so call a manager to ask, thinking lady is possibly a friend. No, she is on vacation right now. Lady explodes into "How can we not have a manager in this entire store!". Um, that's not what I said, but I can get a manager here since I am speaking to one on the phone (just not the top dog). Then lady decides she wants the shoes manager instead. I'm not sure who that is, but I say nothing.

So lady disappears ( I hate it when people do that after screaming in my face demanding a manager, but many do that when their tantrum has ended). Manager shows up and asks customer I'm helping if she needed help. Nope, the lady is behind me (ok not disappeared, just out of my view). Well, I helped 4 customers so didn't catch what the problem was. I caught the manager saying "I understand your frustration" and "Yes, that does tend to happen".  Then lady storms out. Don't ask what lady's problem was. Sometimes it is best not to ask questions.

A Rescue Group's Answering Machine

A RESCUE GROUP'S ANSWERING MACHINE




Press 1 if you have a 10-year-old dog and your 15-year-old son has suddenly become allergic and you need to find the dog a new home right away.



Press 2 if you are moving today and need to immediately place your 150 pound, 8-year-old dog.



Press 3 if you have three dogs, had a baby and want to get rid of your dogs because you are the only person in the world to have a baby and dogs at the same time.



Press 4 if you just got a brand new puppy and your old dog is having problems adjusting so you want to get rid of the old one right away.



Press 5 if your little puppy has grown up and is no longer small and cute and you want to trade it in for a new model.



Press 6 if you want an unpaid volunteer to come to your home TODAY and pick up the dog you no longer want.



Press 7 if you have been feeding and caring for a "stray" for the last three years, are moving and suddenly determine it's not your dog.



Press 8 if your dog is sick and needs a vet but you need the money for your vacation.



Press 9 if you are elderly and want to adopt a cute puppy who is not active and is going to outlive you.



Press 10 if your relative has died and you don't want to care for their elderly dog because it doesn't fit your lifestyle.



Press 14 if you are calling at 6 a.m. to make sure you wake me up before I have to go to work so you can drop a dog off on your way to work.



Press 15 to leave us an anonymous garbled message, letting us know you have left a dog in our yard in the middle of January, which is in fact, better than just leaving the dog with no message.



Press 16 if you are going to get angry because we are not going to take your dog that you have had for fifteen years, because it is not our responsibility.



Press 17 if you are going to threaten to take your ten year old dog to be euthanized because I won't take it.



Press 18 if you're going to get angry because the volunteers had the audacity to go on vacation and leave the dogs in care of a trusted volunteer who is not authorized to take your personal pet.



Press 19 if you want one of our PERFECTLY trained, housebroken, kid and cat friendly purebred dogs that we have an abundance of.



Press 20 if you want us to take your dog that has a slight aggression problem, i.e. has only bitten a few people and killed your neighbor's cats.



Press 21 if you have already called once and been told we don't take personal surrenders but thought you would get a different person this time with a different answer.



Press 22 if you want us to use space that would go to a stray to board your personal dog while you are on vacation, free of charge, of course.



Press 23 if it is Christmas Eve or Easter morning and you want me to deliver an eight week old puppy to your house by 6:30 am before your kids wake up.



Press 24 if you have bought your children a duckling, chick or baby bunny for Easter and it is now Christmas and no longer cute.



Press 25 if you want us to take your female dog who has already had ten litters, but we can't spay her because she is pregnant again and it is against your religion.



Press 26 if you're lying to make one of our younger volunteers feel bad and take your personal pet off your hands.



Press 27 if your cat is biting and not using the litter box because it is declawed, but you are not willing to accept the responsibility that the cat's behavior is altered because of your nice furniture.



Press 28 if your two year old male dog is marking all over your house but you just haven't gotten around to having him neutered.



Press 29 if you previously had an outdoor only dog and are calling because she is suddenly pregnant.



Press 30 if you have done "everything" to housebreak your dog and have had no success but you don't want to crate the dog because it is cruel.



Press 31 if you didn't listen to the message asking for an evening phone number and you left your work number when all volunteers are also working and you are angry because no one called you back.



Press 32 if you need a puppy immediately and cannot wait because today is your daughter's birthday and you forgot when she was born.



Press 33 if your dog's coat doesn't match your new furniture and you need a different color or breed.



Press 34 if your new love doesn't like your dog and you are too stupid to get rid of the new friend (who will dump you in the next month anyway) instead of the dog.



Press 35 if it is Christmas Eve, and the Shih Tzu that you got 7 months ago because your 8 yr old and your 11 yr old PROMISED to take care of it isn't working out and you are going to teach them a lesson by making them walk the dog up to the rescuer's door to give it up. Merry Christmas, kids!



Press 36 if you went through all these 'options' and didn't hear enough. This press will connect you to the sounds of tears being shed by one of our volunteers who is holding a discarded old dog while the vet mercifully frees him from the grief of missing his family.



~Author Unknown, but much appreciated



.

Poor Precious

Precious is ready to tear apart the front door to take a walk outside, but he refuses the harness and now it's raining. Poor Precious. In addition to that, I singed my finger removing fish sticks from the oven. How's your day going?

Pass it on

Niece in college wrote a poem about an unknown jerk stealing her cookie. Ah, I passed my passion for writing down to next generation. Proud aunt here.

Good prayer

This is from a friend.

Now I lay me down to sleep;


I pray the Lord my soul to keep.

if I die before I wake,

will someone please get rid of my porn before my mom goes through my stuff...

Halloween card

Received a Halloween card from aunt with her usual disappointment we don't talk much. Sorry our lives are too boring and routine to have many stories to tell. She said she spoke to my Mom on the phone and disappointed my Mom didn't have more news about us. Let's see, we work, take kids to school, dance classes, playdates, homework, take pets for a walk, plant flowers in the backyard, ride bikes, take walks down the street, and worry what will we do if we loose our job. Not many stories in those things to tell my aunt, or even my Mom.

Let's go over my stories I told this week to my coworkers. Nephew disassembled his toys with Daddy's tools (he got a child tool set for his birthday). Bret Michaels visited my cousin's daughter's wedding celebration taking place on top of a tour bus in Las Vegas (he saw they were having fun from his limo and decided to join the party). Got a catnip plant and started a cat fight when Frodo didn't want to share. That's about it. Today visiting niece and nephew to deliver Halloween specials (Peanuts, Winnie the Pooh). I'm my sister's personal video rental store. But, I only get movies I like and anything I don't have she can TiVo off the satellite. That should take up about 5 minutes of conversation f I actually spoke to my aunt on the phone. Amazing we have FIND stories in our daily lives to satisfy my aunt's lonely life. 

Not much happening here

Sorry for not posting for a while. Not much happens around here.

Let's see, um. Had a tag switcher. Yes, in the addition to shoplifters who don't pay for their merchandise we have tag switchers who give themselves a huge discount.

Definition of tag switcher: Person who removes a lower price tag off 1 item and places it on a higher price item, then complains the scanned price is not correct and demands the lower tag price they put on declaring they found it that way. Well, this person who pretends not to speak English, but understands everything I say, didn't complain until after I gave her change. Which means, I have t call a manager to give a refund. I explain to manager that all the customer's item prices are wrong (clue to spot a tag switcher) Manager refuses the refund explaining the tags are wrong and scanned prices are correct. Customer doesn't want the items now since she ain't getting them 99% off and leaves.

Manager called whoever about catching a tag switcher (another clue is they place the clearance sticker on top of the UPC code hoping I won't able to scan and just type in their price, but often I remove the tag to scan it and refuse to believe a $50 steak knife set is marked down to 99 cents). Manager leaves and come back later stating they stopped the person at another store. I'm unsure if that meant arrested or just caught, but didn't ask questions. In the end, they were caught.  

At least it gave me a story to tell my friends, right?

Jokes of the day

Joke 1
Guy speaking: My girlfriend took my beer and porn and locked it up in a safe. She explained the combination is her birthday.

Me: What a way to get a guy to remember your birthday.


Joke 2
Friend: Time to ditch your man, your friends, and even your phone for a solo adventure. Why? Experts say it will rock your world...and change the way your brain works.

Me: That describes my life every day. Except the 2 days a year I take the cats to the vet.


 

Early bird special

Had an early bird special and expected a large crowd right before the end time for the sale. Waiting, waiting. Had a spurt of customers checking out, but no large crowd. Oh well, I'll just stand here a daydream. Nope, coworkers have to talk to me.

One commented how skinny and beautiful I am while she is fat and ugly. Yeah, we look the same size. Compare pants sizes and there is 1 size difference between us. Amazing. Weight is not a number, but a perception.

Then another coworker failed to understand how can I work as a lowly cashier when I have a college degree. Um, cause nobody will pay me to do anything else.

What about teaching? she asks. Sure, if I had a Master's or PHD, I could be a college professor. But I have a little Bachelor's so that would be a no. How did I get here? I'm college educated. How do I explain that the only people impressed with my Mighty College Education are people who never went to college? But instead, I reply that I intended to use my lovely decorative degree doing museum work, but museum work that requests a history major are volunteers and interns. No, they want fundraisers, accountants, managers of volunteers, you know business majors. The only history major job that pays enough to survive on is the curator and you need 20 years experience to get that job. I'm sorry, I made more money renting cars at the airport than any museum around here.

I'm sorry to say that a precious college degree does not guarentee a 6-figure income or fancy job when you walk out the door.

Amazing

Social network page friend who has a child who was devastated when a friend of theirs commited suicide. In response to comforting her child, this person says that school children need to be nice to each other. I find this amazing coming from the bully from hell from 1st grade through 12th grade. Wow, said person really grew up. I did too, that's why said ex-bully is my social network page friend. 

Joke of the day

Joke of the day: Customer asks how I am really doing (Already replied: I'm always good in front of customers).


Ok. I'm wishing I'm married to a millionaire but there is a short supply of those in Iowa. Ba da dum.

If I were to move to a place where lots of rich people lived, I'm sure the only word a millionaire would say to me would be "Waitress".

What a day

I'm ready to take my break, BUT the coworker who is suppose to come in at the same time I take my break is not there. Okay, 5 minutes late you think she is just stuck in traffic.15 minutes late you think she better be in a ditch. 30 minutes late start to get PO'ed cause I want my break and customers keep coming so can't call for a manager for help. Call for additional sales clerk to help me with the crowd gathering at my register. Coworker and manager come to help. 40 minutes make my coworker's absence when I need a break known to manager. Oh, her husband called to say she was sick and manager forgot all about it. Thanx. Get my break and return to find coworker there. 1 hour late. What is she doing here, she suppose to be sick? She took a sleeping pill instead of a look alike pill she was suppose to take and it knocked her out. Poor dear.

At the end of my shift, I'm by myself and not suppose to abandon the counters. Call for additional help for other registers is heard so wait until I could see no customers to occupy them. Call for a manager and explain I'm suppose to leave 10 minutes ago, can they send someone to relieve me. Get another 15 minutes on my paycheck and relief comes. Yeah, I can use my coupon now. Intend to buy one shirt and walk away with three. Amazing how that happens.  My manager is at the register alone, poor dear. She checks me out and I comment how I learned to be annoying when extra help doesn't come. Hey, the squeaky wheel gets the grease, right? 

Now I'm home. I'm ready for a nap.

Day off

Worked my day off, good thing I had my laundry done when they called. Then asked to stay longer cause we were so busy. Heck yeah, I need all the hours I can get. When it died down and no cars in the parking lot, they said I could leave.

During my 2nd break from extended hours, I saw a half full bag of popcorn in the breakroom. Asked gal if she knew who left it here. Nope. OK, then I am claiming this abandoned and ate it. I had so available cookies too and stuffed my face. I'm selfish when hungry. It's true.

Coupon caper

My poor coworker got a customer w/5 coupons that are 1 per person. Asked her how she got so many. She bought them on Ebay. What kind of idiot buys coupons? Coupons are free people. Probably explains where the phony coupons come from.

Naturally I checked Ebay and yes, you can buy coupons to my store in packs of 5 or 10 for 99 cents to $15. If you do buy coupons, please don't use them all at once or you will raise the alarms in our heads.

Cat walk

I take my cat Precious for a walk. Neighbor with dog comes by and asks if my cat is pregnant. No, I reply, HE is just fat.

Fall cleaning

I get 3 days off and I spend it cleaning my apartment. What is wrong with me? I finally run out of things to clean and can relax. Cats too. They hate the vacuum. I spent 2 nights, 6 hours total, working on my novel to complete: 4 pages. At least I finished a chapter and began another. Oh the trials of creating stories out of your head. Now time for bed. Gotta work tomorow.

9/11 tributes

Reading tributes to 9/11 Anniversary, or rather angry revenge sentiments, I recall Yoda in Episode 1 telling little Anakin:


Fear leads to hate, hate leads to anger, anger leads to suffering. I see much fear in you.

Not all Muslims are the enemy just like not all Christians are neo-Nazis.

10 years ago

10 years ago, I woke up and got ready for work at a airport car rental. The radio driving to work was nonstop talk about a plane crash in Pennsylvania. Whatever. I was frustrated I couldn't find any music on the radio. Show up for my training at my new job (I had a 2nd job as well at the time). My manager cried, OMG, did you see what happened. People had said it was like watching a movie, except this was real. SO unbelievable. Yeah, I heard something about a plane crashing in a field in Pennsylvania, What is going on around here? Manager sent me to the airport bar to watch on TV. There I saw the planes crash into the World Trade Center, the Pentagon, and the field in Pennsylvania.

Manager said all planes landed immediately and they had hundreds at their counter wanting a car. It was crazy this morning. So the rest of the day, I sat in a corner while manager told everyone we are sold out of cars. I returned some cars from stranded passengers. Found out a gal at another car rental had a son who worked at the WTC and after the 1st plane hit, he ran out of his office minutes before the 2nd plane crashed into his office. He did call her to say he was okay at home with his relieved wife.

10 years later, I sit at home watching Kill Bill Vol and in 5 minutes, Vol 2. How appropriate.   

Weirdoes

Why do people ask for a truthful answer to "How R U?". Trust me, you don't want the truth of how my day is going.


I'm happy as a clam and luv my job. What could I possibly be bitchy about?

Wake up call

Got a call from my office asking me to come in hours early from a coworker calling in sick, at 6 AM. I was asleep and didn't wake up to receive message until 11 AM. Sorry, I sleep in when I'm not due to work until the afternoon. Oh well.

Happy Birthday to me

I wake up and pet Frodo ready for attention. Then my monthly visitor has to shed blood all over my pj's and sheets, and mattress cover. So use up my quarters to wash damn sheets instead of clothes. Bet you didn't want to read that. So here I am petting the cats and waiting for sheets to dry. Soon get to work and come home to sleep cause got to get up early tomorrow to work again. Nice birthday for me. At least I have birthday cards to look at. Maybe eat cake later in the week, or maybe next week when my sister finally remembers my birthday like she does every year. Happy Birthday to me.

And on top of all that, the washer or dryer ruins my new bra.

At work I altered my story to The Cat Puked on the sheets b/c thought the blood might be too graphic. Now sitting with the cats eating pizza.

Jennifer Lopez is in the store

Yes, we got Jennifer Lopez and Marc Anthony are at my store (if you don't know which one, then I ain't gonna tell you). I wondered if we are funding their divorce. Customer says poor Marc will paying lots of child support so he neds our money. Nice stuff too.

Visit w/sister

Went over to sister's house to help her with her homework. Time consuming typing was what it was. Sister made supper w/kids who don't like trying new things. Our motto: "If they never had it, then how do they know they don't like it?" Then it was time to pick up their rooms and then they played w/toys. Naturally they wanted on the computer, but I was on it. Then they had to get ready for bed just as I finished up. I realized talking to kids my niece's broken backpack was never replaced. So I go to the store down the street and exchanged it. Niece wanted to come and pick it out, but it was time for bed and they have school tomorrow. I know what she likes. So return and grab more homework for me to do at home. Sister is trying to recruit other volunteers in this endless paperwork her school demands the teachers do.

Back home, give cats their treats and Precious is terrified of me. He growled when I petted him. Frodo got over his vet visit. He let me pet him and play w/him, w/same toy I tricked him with earlier. Now time for bed. That should make them calmer.

Frodo and the vet

Had to trick Frodo into the carrier. First I tried to spark curiosity by taking out my Fall decorations. Precious investigated the noise, but not Frodo. So tried again coaxing w/favorite toy. He was hesitatant going into the bedrooms w/toy, but overcame his fears and we played and played until he got tired. Then I shut the door to trap him. He didn't want to play anymore, he ran for it under the bed. Then under the chair that I picked up and grabbed his curled up ball of fur into the carrier. Meowed all the way there. Then we had to wait. Lab needed his heartworm check test and rabies shot. Dashund picked up from surgery. Then Himalayan cat, seal point, came out from exam room from a flea treatment. Poodle entered door w/tongue hanging from the side b/c her front teeth had been pulled out and in for a check up. Then our time came.

Frodo hissed and growled. Vet tipped the carrier to get him out. Had our exam (skipped the weight part) and shots. Feisty as usual, but no biting. He was a good boy. Returning home, Frodo panted so hard w/tongue sticking out that he drooled all over his paw. He still doesn't like me touching him. Precious was terrified of me, but he had his vet visit 2 months ago. Don't have to go there for another year.

Begging for money

Mom called since rent is due in 2 days wanting to know if I need money. Oh, yes, are you sittng? Much more than she was expecting me to say. Yes, well, I'm not getting many hours so my paychecks are small. I even read off a credit card bill. Gas, groceries, chiropractor, cable tv, phone, cell, electric, my splurge at my retail store (extra discounts we too hard to resist), gift to friend's new baby, car repair, and finally Rent. It all adds up. I told her I did apply for a job at a bookstore that was full time. Haven't seen Full time work for so long I had to soak in the shock before applying. I would love to work at a bookstore, I'm a bookworm. I know, dangerous place work knowing my splurges on sale items. But I need money and can't afford to live on the allowance my current job can give me.

Critics

So the critics are saying since Hurricane Irene lost some of her strong power that the public officials overreacted in their evacuation of the large cities, thus saying they were unncessary. Excuse me? Around 40 known people died in the hurricane and flash floods and critics dare accuse of public officals of overreacting.

Just another day

Today: Donated clothes to Goodwill, sold books and movies to 2nd hand bookstore and applied for job there, saw chiropractor, and grocery shopped. Why R days off more busy than work days?

Lovely day off

Wake up to sirens repeatedly so guessing they have a speed trap across the street from my apartment complex. Next exercise a bit and eat lunch ( I don't get up that early to eat breakfast). On to appointment with eye doctor and it's the same one I had in another town. He moved up here and we meet again. Then post office to mail bills, shopping, and go home to do laundry.



Ok, now I put in a basket full clothes in the washer, add soap, and leave it on to run its course. My neighbors run the water, open lid, add soap, run the water, open lid, add clothes, run water, open lid, add more clothes, run water, and leave. I noticed they don't put in a whole basket full in the washer, more like half a basket. Is there a purpose in this or I'm that ignorant of other's people logic.



Anyway, try to take the cat out but he refuses the harness. Then the rain comes in so windows I opened this morning must be closed. Watch TV while doing laundry. And spend the rest of the day watching movies cause not much is interesting to me to watch regular shows. Now off to bed.

We have a winner

Went to eyeglass store #6 today after work. Found the type of glasses I was looking, of course there is a small selection. I guess the popularity of these glasses went down b/c it took down the sales for sunglasses so manufacturers are edging them out. One pair was the teacher look, another too much resembling my father, and one a little too nerdy for me. I found a pair I liked and made appointment for tomorrow. Oh, relief the search is over.

Today I found the globes I saw a customer coming to my cash register bought. I grabbed one to buy. At closer observance, I notice the map is not aligned correctly, West coast of Africa was a straight line, New England is separated and moved north from the rest of America, and half of Norway and Italy were missing. Not a globe I wish to have and yet the others on display were the same way. Plus it had no year printed on it. Was this borders of 2011 or 2008? Oh well.

Stopped at a fast food place cause I didn't feel like cooking. Yum, yum.

The Adventures of Just Being Me

I should have my own reality show, but too scared I wouldn't have enough adventures for a whole series.

Ok, so working for my job I get a discount card for eyewear though not signed up for their eyecare plan. Check the list of nearby places that take this card. I end up going to 5 places b/c I want specific glasses that have magnets to keep the shades that come with the glasses in place. Naturally, I want to check out the eyewear these places have before commiting to an appointment and buying new glasses.

Nobody gets what I'm asking them when they get around to asking me if I need help. At one place I tried on several glasses for at least 20 minutes before someone spoke to me. Then the only ones that fit my tiny face were rimless and I'm not sure I like the whole new look of it. I sat for 5 minutes for this lady to tell me there are no appointments available until next week. One lady thought I wanted the magnets on my current glasses replaced and they don't carry the magnets. Then thought I wanted the shade part replaced and the shades are made specifically for each pair so she can't do that. One more time, I want a whole new set of glasses, I just want the type that have the magnets like the ones I got now before I visit your eye doctor. Geesh. Oh, no they don't have that kind. Ok, next place.

So hard looking at glasses in the first place. Like shoe shopping (I always say the most popular shoes are always the uglyist), they make the most fugly glasses that don't flatter anyone's face. No wonder people wear contacts or get laser surgery. And what does geek chic mean anyway? Who wants to walk around the world looking like a geek? I can't think of any.

Keep trying, maybe have to go to the place I got the ones I have now (a hour away from me now).  

New shirts

Got new t-shirts that are scratch-n-sniff. They have a sticker that says "Rub me, Smell me, Love me". Yeah, I'll do that w/Brad Pitt's picture on it.

People watching

Today I saw a lady walk up to a push/pull door, look around, watched a guy walk through the automatic door next to it, and lady walks through the automatic door. Must not know how to open a door.

Do people go into stupid mode when shopping? Had people get confused, ask if I already gave them their receipt, move things around in their purse, and finally snap back into reality when they suddenly realize I just want their signature. Yes, you have to sign for your credit cards.

Poor dear

Finally asked a coworker I hardly see who died a while back (2 weeks ago). Her dog. Poor thing ate a new kind of treat, fiberous treat got stuck, surgery removed the fibers twisted like rope, got infection, spread, dog so sick they decided to put to sleep. All that from a new treat. Treat company is paying her vet bills and pulled the treat from the stores. She's still in shock and grieving. Poor dear.

New joke

New joke I made up today. When someone checks out Tony Hawk stuff, I comment how someone must be a Tony Hawk fan. I like him much better since he got divorced. Ba da dum.

2 coworkers didn't get it. I meant I like him best as Single.

RIP Jani Lane

I remember Cherry Pie coming out and couldn't figure out what the controversy was about. I didn't have cable so never saw the video until years later. I loved I Saw Red and Uncle Tom's Cabin along w/Heaven Isn't Too Far Away. May Jani Lane rest in peace in heaven after a lifetime battling demons. Heaven isn't far away anymore.

Overnight

Last overnight w/niece and nephew for a while. Took kids school shopping. Then supper and movies at my place. Did laundry. We watched the bonus shorts instead of bedtime stories. Cats teriffied of nephew's remote car, especially when heading towards them.

PS.Forgot to mention the miracle today. Niece was too sick to go shopping w/us. Then after my hug and checking her pj label for her size, she was better and ready to shop. Amazing.

My poor ankle

Come to work to find coworker called in sick so can I work an extra hour. Oh, yes. Problem: I now get a lunch break and didn't bring lunch. Ok so lunch break and I decided to drive down to the mall down the street. Parking lot construction made me park further from the cafe court outside doors and park next to the department store. Next the door separating the store from the mall is closed so can't get to the cafe court. Must revamping the cafe court too. Screw this and go across to the store w/snack bar. Get my food and return to my store's break room. Time to clock in. Plus all this extra walking exhausted my poor twisted ankle to twitch from pain. Ate a chicken tender and put rest in locker for final short break. Hey, at least I got a story to tell, right?



Finished lunch during break and eventfully went home. Stopped on the way to the chiropractor. Ever since I fell my back has been hurting bad. I fell forward, but the limping didn't help the problem. Back fixed so went grocery shopping. Too tired to do laundry so take a nap. Wake up to load dishwasher. Now, watching Sweet Home Alabama. Love that movie. Soon going to bed and work again to tomorrow. Then spend my days off babysitting my niece and nephew. Get to take them back to school shopping and do an overnight. Bought prepared sugar cookie dough for the occasion.

To the pool

Got a call from sister to babysit so she can go to the doctor. I can take them swimming (so she can do errands too in peace). Pick up kids. Nephew doesn't want to put on his shoes. Niece is wearing pants and tell her to put on shorts. Ok, we will stay in the aprtment and not go swimming, if they don't want to cooperate. He puts his shoes on and she puts on shorts.

Next complaint, my car is hot and they refuse to touch the door handles. My lord, I never seen children so scared of things. What do you think adults do w/out crying and whining. Yes the seat belts are hot and put them on carefully. Nephew is convinced adults feel less than kids.

Ok, drive down the road and nephew wants to go to the pool we drive by. That is not my apartment pool (my pool is free). Nephew thought we were going to amusement park pools w/waterslides. No, we go to my apartment pool. Get to my apartment and I have to finish hanging up the laundry and they put their swimsuits on. Off we go making the kids carry something. Auntie's hands are full w/towels, bag, umbrella, and waterjug so any toys kids don't carry get left behind.

Walk to the pool and settle down. Set the umbrella in a hole in the wood deck near the pool. Perfect. Niece hestitates getting in and nephew follows me right into the cool water. Not too cold today. Niece wants to see my tricks. I make her let go of the edge and away from the steps before I do. Otherwise she would never let go and shiver in fear the whole time. Take pictures for sister and husband to see. A group of kids come in w/life jackets. I tell nephew he can swim in the deep end when he puts on a life jacket. Inner tube is not good enough. One kids wants to join our beach ball catch, and then another, then another, and another. Kid and nephew start tossing the ball too hard and too far making me or the other chase it. That's enough for me and put the ball away. Nephew needs to learn to play nicely. Kid wants to play with our kickboard and noodle. I know the trauma of taking a toy away from any child so we will not start. Kid wants to know why, kid wants to play with it? I say, Cause it's ours. Then kid's moter hollers over to leave our things alone.

Niece starts to get pink so I decide to go inside. It has been over an hour. Leaving the gate, I can't see the steps from all the things I'm holding and go kerplunk.I prove to nephew that adults do get hurt. Why just don't cry, whine, and pout about it. Hobble back causing my niece to call me old from my hobbling. I'm not old, I'm in pain. Get a snack in the apartment and kids take a shower. None for me cause I need a band aid and ice. Shower later when better healed. Enjoy features and a TV show before sister picks up the kids. Show off new furniture. Then off they go. Ah, peace.  

Invitation

Got an invite to cousin's daughter's bridal shower. I feel so old. Soon my niece will be getting married and having babies. Then I'll be a great-aunt. I'm not ready for this.

Where did my kitty go?

Come home to be greeted by Precious. No Frodo. Look all over apartment calling him to hear no meow. Find him snuggled in the chair near the front door. Bad cat not answering me.

Nephew's birthday party

Nephew had his birthday party today. His birthday is tomorrow which is the same birthday of a dead cousin so it is a happy and sad day for me. At least it makes it easy to remember.



We had a Cars theme cake and decorations. Niece got excited too and ready to play with his presents. We had to hold her back explaining the toys are Nephew's things so he plays with them first and she takes her turn when he is finished.



It was a small party with grandparents and me (I have to drive Mom). We had dinner and cake w/ice cream. After getting all the gifts out of the boxes and kids started playing with them, we all left.

Family Reunion

Went to family reunion. It was in a A/C'ed house and more than usual people came so some people had to sit on the floor. Host had his daughter and 2 grandsons living with them. I enjoyed watching my mother play Candyland w/a stranger's boys. She would never play Candyland (or any game for that matter) with us kids nor her grandkids, ever. Hostess's cousin in Virginia came w/5 gradnkids. The Cousins now retired want to go out to Virginia and visit DC with this cousin and husband. But we young people are too poor for such an adventure.



Got the usual questions, How's my job? When am I getting a new job? When do I start getting vacation and how many days off? Nobody asks about my cats or my finishing my novels, what I do for fun, of course. Just work questions. Retired people had to trade adventures and ailments. Why do old people insist on telling everybody what's wrong with them. Widows traded experiences finding new life after losing their husbands. Poor aunt planned on their retirement years traveing all over the states and now she has to go alone or wait for one of her relatives to open their schedule. All together it was a good day.

Advocating for animals

I advocate animals on this webpage Pet Pardons to bring awareness that perfectly good pets are being killed every day. So if any of them wish to get a pet, please get one out of their nearby shelters and rescues. Save a life.

Today, I notice the Pet Pardons comments section isn't available. I wonder b/c readers leave nasty messages calling owners who surrender their pets at high kill shelters pieces of garbage, etc. How do we know these people aren't jobless, foreclosed, evicted, and now homeless? Or their home was burned, their owners died, or paycheck cut so can't afford to take of them. Would it better for the animal to be left in a ditch to be hit by a car or abandoned in their empty foreclosed house to starve to death? These people care enough about their beloved pets to take them to the shelter nearest to them (high kill or low kill).

If these people are so passionate to write nasty messages, then help find new owners or rescues for the pets on death row instead cursing the former owners. Start you own rescue group like Pet Pardons founder did.

Time w/niece

Suggested bowling as a fun activity for out of state teen niece staying at my sister's house. Sister wasn't sure, niece is very lukewarm about an activity available (granted there are not a lot of things to do here in the first place). I make her ask her anyway. Niece would like do that. Younger niece and nephew never been to a bowling alley before, but have enjoyed kid multi-colored pins w/plastic ball at my place.

Ok, first problem is little kids don't want to change their shoes. They must otherwise the floor gets scratched up. They don't care if the whole floor is scratched up by their sneakers. Yes I know that, but the bowling alley people do care so take the shoes off. Next, they cry cause shoelaces are tied together and have knots along the laces (Untied the laces and don't worry about the knots). Niece's shoelace is broken so one is longer than the other (I tie her shoes and double tie when she whines she will trip on the long lace). Ok, next problem. Niece wants a pink ball. The kid balls are orange, pink ones are way too heavy. Orange ball too heavy so want pink ball that is 4 pounds heavier. Both complain the ball is too heavy, but brother-in-law shows them how to toss it. (We are not playing volleyball here so ball can be a little heavy). I show how to toss it holding w/both hands and swing between straddled legs (the kid way). Well, brother-in-law didn't want to teach that way. OK. But when their arm got tired, we told them to use both hands. I haven't had lunch so I get a drink and cheesesticks w/fries. Nephew is thirsty and hungry. He just ate so his Daddy will have to pay for it (I'm not their Genie who grants all wishes). Daddy isn't buying anything cause they just ate. At the end when my refill needed to disappear I let the kids finish it.

Ok, so we start to bowl and the kids have so much fun bowling w/bumpers (wish they had bumpers when I was young). When kids were pooped, we took turns bowling for them. I even grabbed the kids ball and bowled the kids way described above making the kids laugh. Sometimes we just need a laugh. So when 2 games were over, kids got over being tired. Too late, game over.

Next, we go home so brother-in-law can mow the lawn before it rains. So we sit and talk to my sick sister. Kids have to cuddle with her. Brother-in-law got out popicles and niece wanted to eat hers while laying on top of Mommy. Sister didn't want a popicle dripping on her so had to eat it in the kitchen. Niece doesn't feel well so stays home while the rest of us go to the amusement. If it was up to nephew, we would stay on one ride all day. But we make him get off after 2 turns. Ride things until park closed and went home soaking wet. I had to go grocery shopping afterwards so walked through the store very cold and wet. Then went to bed so could get up early for work today. Tomorrow is family reunion.