Last night

Had quite a last night at the hotel. Banquets reported the ballroom was trashed and chandelier broken last night. Had complaints of kids running around like wild animals unsupervised, knocking on doors, hitting all the buttons on the elevator, hanging out in the gym, and shooting gel pellets all over the hallway which the housekeeper had to vacuum up and prayed they didn't ruin the carpet. A few unsupervised kids were walked to their chaperone and all gave my coworker attitude. Oh, we can't kick them out because they are part of a church group having a conference in the ballroom. You think I won't kick their butts out in the middle of the night, just try me. I have kicked out people before and can do it again. But since it is my last night, I left it to the night auditor to call the cops and kick them out if the chaperones can't control their kids. At least they leave tomorrow. No longer my problem.

Today I drank some cocoa with my new mug I received from my manager for Christmas. You could say this is my Christmas bonus along with a bag of candy from HR. Happy New Year! I start a new job Thursday so taking 2 days off after my last day at the hotel to actually enjoy a holiday instead of working for a floating holiday. I intend to party tonight. Even picked out the dress I will wear tonight.

Wow, I am the master of weird dreams. Laying in bed praying for roommates to be blessed with jobs like I was blessed. Not just for me, but for their sanity too. A deep voice answered, It will be so, they shall have jobs. They have to do the work. Then in the distance I viewed a group of demons surrounding them. A bright light forced them to leave and both of them huddled crumpled on the ground resembling red rocks. A Jesus figure walked up to them and extended his arm. They took his arm and stood up. He said to one, you are blessed and hugged him. Then he said to the other, go in peace and hugged her. Then a bright light shined from above and a dove started flying above their heads. I heard organ music playing as they held hands. Then I smiled and woke up. I hope that means they are getting jobs soon.

Deer in the yard

Funny, turning off Christmas lights around the house when spot a deer in the driveway. Then saw another by the tree. Tiptoed around to hold still watching from the window. I wonder if they are eating the carrots I left by a tree for the squirrels. They sniffed the area where the carrots but unsure if they nibbled them. They kept looking around and eventually left.

Funny, hotel wanted me to stay as a shuttle driver and work weekends. We had a former driver come by asking to be rehired as part time or full time. I introduced him to the Front Desk Manager. And they are cutting hours on everybody until business picks up again. No thank you.

RIP Alice

RIP Linda Lavin who played Alice in the TV show "Alice". I watched that show growing up and enjoy the reruns. Have to watch some reruns to honor her. Guess there is only a couple people from that show still alive, the actress who played Belle and the one who played Flo.

RIP Jimmy Carter

RIP Jimmy Carter. A former president more known for his Habitat for Humanity work than anything he did as President. Amazing how he lived 100 years and people thought that wasn't enough.

Almost the last day

Quite a day. Drove the shuttle for 2 hours and then had hoards from a group wanting to check in early. Yeah, had to take names and phone numbers down to text when rooms were ready. Let's just say it's 7 PM and 8 people are still waiting for rooms to be cleaned. So happy tomorrow is my last day.

Invitation Declined

Well, my niece declined the invitation to go out New Year's Eve. She decided to stay home and sleep. Got the OK from my bartender I can hang out with them. All people from the hotel job so I know everybody in the group.

Making New Year's Plans

Asked niece if she wanted to go barhopping on New Year's now that she is 21 years old and legally can drink alcohol. She said yes so tryign to figure out good places to take her. Of course I will be picking her up and taking her home. So many places are selling tickets for their evening event and I don't want to do that. I also asked a bartender friend if she minds I hang up with her and her former hotel coworkers. We celebrated my birthday together and at a bar, then other coworkers arrived for a drink to wish me a happy birthday. Will see what happens.

That was fun. Went to bed at 7 PM to get up at 3 AM to drive shuttle for flight crew. Landline phone woke me up and clock says 8:15. Thinking I overslept and missed work, immediately contact the hotel and manager apologizing my phone alarms failed to wake me up. Everything is fine. It's 8:15 PM. Oh, OK. Going back to sleep then.

Merry Christmas

Sad day. My sister's mother-in law died this morning. And I am going to their house after work to deliver presents. Then visit our Mom.

Sister's mother-in-law I met at their celebrations. She was nice lady who never met a pet she didn't like. Every birthday she brought presents for both kids so the other didn't get jealous of the one having the birthday.

Brother and sister didn't feel like entertaining today and wanted to be alone. Well, I had presents to deliver for niece and nephew so stopped by after work in the afternoon. No grand dinner and sister bought treats from the grocery store. We ate pancakes cause niece wanted pancakes for breakfast, but sister hadn't made them yet. Niece liked her present, but nephew was working at a move theater. Hugged the family in condolences of the lost stepmother of my brother-in-law. Brother-in-law said she was sick for a while so not unexpected.

Then visited my Mom at the nursing home. Played Christmas music for her. She talked nonstop but could barely hear her soft voice. Then the nurse came by to walk her to dinner so I left. She ate with 3 other residents so family doesn't have to babysit her eating to make sure she doesn't choke.

Then went home. Baked a cherry pie the roommates got with food stamps. Apparently they couldn't cook it themselves all day being drunk and high. No food delivery cause the bike chain needs oil and roommate needs to get back into shape to ride it everywhere delivering food.

Feel disappointed. I couldn't get more treats made and deliver them to the chiropractor and mechanic like I usually do at Christmas. I didn't have money or time to make gingerbread men or sugar cookies I usually make. I didn't even buy Christmas presents, just some candy to put in our stockings. Everyone else got merchandise I couldn't sell. Waiting to change jobs is pushing on my patience. Driving the shuttle this week at 4:30 AM to take a flight crew to the airport. I need the tips and management needs to cut hours. I'm like, do they realize I make more than shuttle drivers? They got the other supervisor driving the shuttle too. That is one thing I won't miss leaving this job. I pray I don't return. I can't afford to stay here, I need more income with my mortgage going up $200 a month. That really hurts my finances paying 54% of my net pay to my mortgage. And can't sell the house and move into an apartment cause rent anywhere is higher than my mortgage payment. I share these feelings and get told to get over myself cause Christmas is about Christ not me. OK, then. Have yourself a merry litle Christmas.

Bike came early

Roommate's bike came today. He had it put together when I came home. He need to fill the tires with air so took him 3 blocks to the gas station and he rode back while I went to the store to pick TP and wine for more cupcakes with my tip money. I hardly have any cupcakes to give people tomorrow. Roommate commented how I said they could have one. Yeah, one, not eat the entire container. They were busy last night and today doing laundry. They even did mine. Still working on it. Anyway, came home and Roommate was gasping for air. That trip home on the bike wore him out. Need to start exercising and cut the smoking so he doesn't hurt himself. He is ready to commence food delivery tonight and make money. He is so happy. He wants to work so bad and nobody will hire him.

Merry Christmas Eve

Got tips driving the shuttle so bought another bottle of moscato wine (Red Moscato this time) to make a simple bundt cake for Christmas. I don't have enough cupcake holders to make more cupcakes. Well, cake stuck to the bundt pan, so fell apart (and I should have let it cool first bu was in a huryry to get to bed to wake up 3 AM). Oh well, I can melt my old frosting and pour it over instead of frosting it with a knife. Got to get to bed when this turkey is cooked. I learned not to bake a cake and turkey at the same time. Top of cake got a little burnt in a few places. Tastes good. Ate some turkey and moist even without the usual bacon strips I put on. Basted it regularly.

Special Trip

Brought over girlfriend to visit her family for Christmas. It's her grandmother's house who also has her Dad, her Aunt, and her 2 brothers. I commented about making cookies and Dad he can give us food items. Roommate is home to let the dryer delivery guy inside. Girlfriend has aspirations of being a tattoo artist. Looking for a place to take her in as an apprentice. Needs to work on her portfolio. Apparently you just need a permit in Iowa to do tattoos that includes a first aid certificate that she has. She is picking up her tattoo gun from her Dad. They sell fake skin to practice. You can't do tattoos at home and need business license to open a shop. So she would have work at an employer. She needs to get a sketchbook to work on her portfolio. Roommate is excited getting a first and free tattoo. Apparently tatoos are expensive. I wouldn't know.

Family Christmas

Funny when older kids look at younger kids to ask: Was I like that?

My reply: Yes, you were exactly like that (and I enjoy every memory of it)

Today is the big family Christmas dinner. Watched kids open presents. Mom keeps falling asleep. Catch up with family not on social media. Good day. Mom's health is declining and we just put her in long term skilled care. But she has a friend there happy to see her again. They lived in the senior living apartments my Mom moved into after Dad died. Not all bad.

Wow, I come home and roommate announces China is planning to invade the USA. Um, ok, I figured out why my icicle lights went out, the extension cord fell down. Roommate points out I'm not too concerned about China murdering us with bombs. Grab zip ties to tie the extension cord to the drain pipe to keep it from disconnecting from the lights. Come back inside to explain, no I am not concerned about China Invading and building a bunker is my back yard. 1, China is in Asia so would invade the coast first and invade a thousand miles to get to us. 2, USA government is handing out extra weapons to other countries, hence we have enough weapons to defend the country. Roommate then tells his girlfriend to tell her schizo dad to stop sending youtube videos. OK, at least he saw my point.

Once I came home, roommate asked when the bicycle I ordered was coming. Per tracking number, due on the day after Christmas. Roommate called their Dad to wish them a Merry Christmas. They have an interview the day after Christmas and so happy. Then they signed for a food delivery service since the bike is on the way. He got hired on and so happy he was shouting and crying. He is so grateful I got him a bike for Christmas. Now have to get him a new phone. That will have to wait for new job causing all my money this month has to pay bills and mortgage. Have to get a few groceries and batteries tomorrow. I am out of sugar and eggs. Sure there are substitutes for ingredients, but they aren't as good.

I realized this is the first Christmas since 2005 (Precious arrived in 2006) I have not had a pet to write a version of Night Before Christmas from their point of view witnessing Santa's arrival (no more Santa Trap stories cause those were ferret stories). I haven't written a Christmas letter for this year. Let's see, declared bankruptcy, worked a job for 3 weeks before forced to quit, moved from night auditor to supervisor at the hotel, and finally found a new job that starts after the New Year. I think I will skip that this year too. Have yourself a Merry Little Christmas.

Baking Frenzy

Baking today. Got Snickerdoodles, English Toffee, and Fudge done. During watching Saturday Night Live, I made Almond Bark Pretzels.

First time for everything

Oh my. Had a coworker offer to buy me a drink after work last night. They couldn't do a strawberry margarita at the bar so ordered a rum and coke. That turned into a drag show that was a contest for amateurs. One had their wig fall off during their performance. They picked it up, put it back on their head as if it was part of the show. Coworker gave me dollars to give the performers. I couldn't spend money cause I needed my tips to buyer a dryer. Then the contest had a tie. After the show, coworker hugged me wishing me well in my new job and said they will miss me. Waited for the alcohol to wear off before driving home. Realized I forgot to tell my roommates I will be late getting home. I had only 1 rum and coke. Roommate wasn't happy viewing me drunk and commented how I was lucky wasn't pulled over. I swore I had just 1 drink, that was all.

How nice. Open the Store App to get free delivery on my dryer and sign in with my email. I already have an account and a Best Buy credit card in the Wallet. Under someone else's name using my email. Deleted the account.

Tips I got last night and the night before are really helping not empty my bank account. Phone, car insurance, and water got to be paid this week.

Hallelujah, Praise the Lord. Went to store to buy dryer. Have to order the cheap one cause not in store. The floor model is more expensive and can't afford it. Clerk puts in my info for delivery and I have a membership. Yes, I got a membership when had laptop fixed last summer. I thought that just covered computer repair. Wait, that gives me a discount and free delivery. Whoa, more expensive floor model has bigger discount that makes price lower that the cheap one I intended to buy. I will take the floor I get delivered in 3 days instead waiting 7 days. Paid my bill in cash. Monday I am getting a new dryer. Oh my, my nerves are shot. I'm so happy. Thank you who donated to make this day happen. Merry Christmas. OK, the floor model wasn't cheaper, it was $10 more expensive but small price to pay to get dryer 4 days sooner.

Then went grocery shopping for ingredients to bake weekend. Going to make English Toffe, Fudge, Almond Bark Pretzels, and Cookies.

Had a good time with new job Christmas party. Met everyone and spouses. Good conversation and getting to know everyone. They loved my cupcakes.

Party Invite

Oh my, I got invited to new job Christmas party. Of course I am going. I have the day off. Going to bring my infamous pink moscato cupcakes my coworkers love so much. One coeorker is sad to see me leave cause I am the most patient trainer who teaches them how to do things.

2 days of driving the shuttle and run front desk produced 0 rides for guests. Last night, took 3 trips to and from Wells Fargo for a concert. I have tips to buy ingredients for baking. Going to be busy this weekend.

So happy to be leaving. My general manager was fired last night and I checked in the task force general manager into his hotel room. I will miss the man. He helped us at the front desk, worked hard to improve this hotel without a renovation.

Update: Wow, texted the former manager goodbye and he answered he worked for the company for over 6 years to wish me a happy holiday. No severance pay and fired a week before Christmas. What is wrong with these people. He moved his family here from out of state when he took the job last year.

Getting a New Dryer

Decided I will get the dryer this weekend. I need to save up my cash advances from job to pay the utilities hitting me soon. I don't want to use donations to pay the electric bill. Well, I haven't been washing my clothes and hanging them to dry. Been wearing my clothes twice expecting to get a new dryer soon. Hope nobody at work noticed. I sprayed perfume on. 3 days to go.

Ok, I broke down and my washed the undergarments plus dress pants. I have enough clean sweaters to get me through the weekend. Jeans I wear at home so nobody will care if worn more than once.

Got a call at work from roommate at work about comments on social media. All I said was I was planning to get the dryer this weekend. What is the fuss about? Have I read my social media?, asks my roommate. No, I am working, I replied. Well, Facebook friends go into the chorus of "Throw the Bums Out". They aren't helping me pay for that dryer, I had to do a fundraiser to get it. That upset my roommate is is applying everywhere and can't get a job. He hopes now that he is 21, he can get a job at a bar, even just doing a line cook job he will take it. I think they are suffering cabin fever.

Had to write a defense of my roommate and girlfriend who was so upset about what people said about them. So I wrote this:

OK. My roommates are very upset being badmouthed when they are about to give up hope of getting a job. They hate me talking about them cause people come out swinging what parasites they are and throw the bums out.

They are not like you. They have been abandoned by their families after surviving years of child abuse. They have a birthday and nobody calls to ask how they are doing. They barely speak to their family and hardly have any friends. It does appear from the outside they are using me. They are trying to get jobs. They have donated plasma, pawned things, and signed up for food stamps to get groceries. They were so happy I told them a former manager of mine was willing to help them find a job. They help clean and do dishes and watch me get stressed out over my finances I can't function or run my business. I let them stay because I refuse to repeat what their families did to them. We need each other. If anyone can help them get a job, please do so.

Then coworker asked for a ride home froma bar. I am driving the hotel shuttle so I pick him up. I am hurt. Picked up a drunk coworker who told me they have no respect for me after leaving and returning twice and set to leave a 3rd time. I get promoted to supervisor and immediately start looking for a new job. What can I say to explain that? I can't afford to live on what this company is willing to pay me. I need more income and this place stresses me out. And new job is better hours, better pay, and holidays off. I hope I stay at this new job. I don't want to return here.

What do you want?

Well, my roommate got tired of the phone calls for insurance every 2 minutes that he unplugged all 3 phones in my house after they woke him up. When I came home and plugged them back in, he started pranking them pretending to be a Chinese restaurant since I had insurance. I said be careful about my siblings on speed dial popping up. But then we communicate by text not phone calls.

Getting Insurance Nightmare

OMG getting health insurance for new job is such a nightmare. Have to go through search engines online which means 20 insurance agents are calling my house at once. Answer the first one and premium costs too much. Keep shopping. Health insurance from employer is a week's pay and cost I can't handle. Now we got HRA and EPO and have no idea what those are. Maybe I just won't have insurance once I start my new job.

It is finished. Got Obamacare insurance with premium tax credit and dental. Went elsewhere for Vision insurance.

I did talk to one agent and they wanted too much money and don't do HSAs that I wanted. PPO only. Apparently only one company I can get a policy from with a HSA option. I like those debit cards, they help pay for stuff. I got it with the premium tax credit.

Now that I have health insurance, I let my roommate answer the phone to prank people. Since I used a search engine, who knows how many are real insurance agents. He answers pretending to be a Chinese restaurant and then later answered yelling "What!!". He makes me laugh.

Relief

I am literally crying. I get emails when people donate to my gofundme page. I have enough to buy the dryer. Thank you to those who donated. The biggest donor was a relative with a very well paying job. Another big donor was someone whose house flooded durign a hurricane months ago. Today I get to do laundry the hard way drying clothes with a space heater and ceiling fan. I will do the necessary laundry like dress pants and unmentionables.

OK, I didn't get the laundry done. I figure I can wear clothes twice until I get my dryer delivered. Got the clothing rack to dry things. Got all my new items photographed and online ready to be sold. I have to wait to get money to buy supplies to make these things. I holding out on hope someone will buy something. I need money for dishwasher now. Sure I cna do the dishes by hand, but dishwashers are nice and this one has to be run twice to get things cleaned. Plus keeps clogging up.

Probably have to shut down my online business after Christmas. I can't keep buying supplies to have few people buys things. I was hoping to expand into food items, make videos to advertise my food mixes for sale, maybe even sell of cookbook when get enough videos done, and eventually open a bakery in town. None of that is going to happen now. I don't have much spare time to run my shop and stress is killing me. Maybe with my new job with stable hours I can see if I feel better to continue on.

Unsolicited Advice

I was so happy getting a new job and now have to deal with a broken dryer. I am so stressed I can't run my business from being emotionally paralyzed and it's so hard to get anything done. I'm told to go to a laundromat, buy a used dryer, or hang your clothes to dry.

I don't have a truck to go get a used dryer and how am I going to get into the basement and move the old one out. I don't have a dolly. And no, I can't just go rent them cause I'm broke.

I'm not sure I want a used dryer for $50. How long will it last before it breaks and back where I am now?

Watching TV and get a vision of my Dad hugging me telling me I will be OK. Then I will get a surprise next week. Like what, my furnace going out and frozen pipes flood my basement. Or maybe fridge breaking too. Will see if anything happens I am not expecting. My Misty cat told me in a dream something was coming that I will always remember. I think my new job qualifies for that. Well, good night.

Need New Clothes Dryer

Well, brother changed the dryer belt and now it won't heat. He checked the fuses, thermometer, and heating element. Those are fine. He says there is nothing he can do. I need a new dryer. He said to go to a laundromat to clean my clothes (of course I can't use his washing and dryer machines). Buying a clothes rack to dry my clothes the hard way that end up stiff and scratchy. Started a gofundme page to raise funds. I hate begging for money, but people aren't buying from my online shop. 11 days until Christmas and still getting stuff made that probably nobody will buy. I'm so stressed it emotionally paralyzes me. And I was so happy getting a new job, then this happens. My soul is broken.

In my begging for funds for a new dryer and dishwasher, a social media friend reaches out to help my roommates find jobs. They are an old manager and know lots of people businesses. He can help get them interviews. I told them and their eyes lit up as they smiled. They are excited to receive any help they can get. They are ready to give up hope of finding a job. They are going crazy with cabin fever. They clean around the house just to do something. If they both were working, I probably wouldn't be in the financial mess I am in now, which makes my social media friends make snarky remarks that offend my roommates. None of the snarky people are helping me, but ready to take cheap shots at my roommates. They see freeloaders that I am fully supporting, what do they really expect?

Got paid today so went grocery shopping and mailed Christmas cards.

Relaxing on my lazy boy recliner watching Die Hard and had a dream of Mom during a panic attack tremor fit. She just said to Sleep Tight and kissed me goodnight. Which is weird cause she never kissed me goodnight as a kid, not even read me a bedtime story.

Dryer Broken

I was hoping to get a new pet for Christmas with my new job coming Jan 2. My brother came to change the dryer belt and he can't figure out why heat went out. All fuses are good. He commented the dryer looked 25 years old. My soul is crying. I am struggling to pay for food. I hate begging for money, but I have to. I started a gofundme fundraiser for new dryer and dishwasher. I was so happy getting a new job. I don't know what else to do.

I'm regretting quitting that shuttle driver job cause I need the tips. But also wanted to finish my cocoa mix jars I haven't had time to do. I'm still trying to sell stuff, just don't have time to take pictures and make things anymore, then hardly anybody buys anything. I hate giving up. Animal shelters are having deals like $25 or $35 per pet adoption. I have cat food left I thought of adopting an adult cat, maybe a small dog too. But now I can't.

Then, a ray of light. Brother said he can check the heating element with his meter and replace it so hopefully my dryer can work again. Cheaper than buying a new clothes dryer. I have no idea what he is talking about, but if he can fix my dryer then I will not stand in his way. He worked for a commerical laundry machine company for years and his job was making laundry machine parts in a computer as elelctrical engineer. Once he said he tested the fire suppression system in their dryers by creating fires in them in a lot outside the factory. He once went to New York City to fix apartment and laundomat machines. He knows what he is doing and I am grateful for it.

I have prayed for months for a new job and in a dream this month God answered about giving free will. I asked if everything was free will. If people survive near death experiences, it that really free will? Evil people succeed and good people fail, is that free will? I begged to have mercy on me, I just want a job to take care myself. I'm tired asking for help, I can't pray anymore. I know the world is a mess, but can he have mercy for me. My new job working Sundays stops me from going to church. I would gladly go to church if I could. God said he would make his presence known more. 2 weeks later I get a new job. Free will, or God's mercy?

Oh Christmas Tree

Breakfast Supervisor came to complain we hardly have anything out and it's 14 days until Christmas. Told them about the decorations in storage. So out comes the Banquets people then Sales came out to decorate a bit more. I helped and gave me a gift. Then General Manager arrived with a bunch of poinsettias. Poinsettias fell over every time the door opened and wind rushed in. So doubled up on the wreaths around them. Manager put rocks on top of the soil to weight them down after watering the plants. More festive now.

OMG, I am freaking out here. Siblings are planning to move Mom to long term skilled care so already stressed figuring out what to put in her room and what to take for us. I don't have room for any of her furniture. One sister said our Mom qualifies for hospice care. Is my Mom going to be alive on Christmas Day? Now have to worry how to live without my mother. My siblings barely speak to me.

Then I come home to a job offer, starting Jan 2. Have to get fingerprints done since handling confidential information. Been through that before. I am so happy I can't stop shaking. Have to get through Christmas and New Year’s first. I prayed for so long for this opportunity. Now have to quit the shuttle driver job at the other hotel. I don't want to work 6 days a week and have to go to bed at 7 PM.

Seemed unfair to continue working there to quit in a couple weeks. Said in the email it was nice meeting everyone. Manager understood and commented how it would have been nice if I got this offer sooner so he could have hired someone else.

Goodbye Christmas Tree

Had a surprise visitor, my old supervisor who came for a Christmas tree he left behind. I offered a pen as a gift and he declined. Oh well, I gave him a hug and said I missed him.

Happy Birthday Sister

Heard from the financial advisors asking if I was still interested cause they are wrapping up interviews. I emailed back I was. I am praying so hard to get this job. Secretary job so what I am doing now with better hours and holidays off. They said they will contact me in 2-3 days.

Happy Birthday to my sister. Turning 60 today and counting the years towards retirement.

Living in Poverty

Hooray! Got enough tips to pay the mortgage. I know people criticize tips, but those tips are needed to pay bills and buy food. I can't wait for my next paycheck to pay the mortgage.

Again, the dryer goes out mid cycle. Trying the unplug and try again in an hour. I am so tired of this. I don't know what to do.

After an hour unplugged, it worked again. Roommate said he cleared out all the lint from dryer and the hose that goes outside, problem has to be something else.

Dear God, It's me, Jordan, Send Help

Now my clothes dryer keeps going out. And half my outdoor Christmas lights don't work. Sigh.

Replaced my icicle lights that didn't work on the roof. So pretty. Lights around my trees need replaced.

Unplugged the dryer and after a while it started working again. I don't know what to do. Asked brother for help and he ordered a new belt for the dryer.

New job as Shuttle Driver

Started new job today as shuttle driver for a different hotel. Night auditor and shuttle driver didn't know I was coming. I gather I am covering the shuttle driver's days off. Went to bed at 6 PM to get some sleep to the distress of my roomamte who woke me up asking why I went to bed so early. Because I have to get up at 3 AM. Woke up and cops are blocking my street. Don't know what was going on, but slipped around to get to work.

Meeting the staff coming in the morning. I gather the head housekeeper was the breakfast cook and started a load of laundry. Held a housekeeping meeting in Spanish next to me.

Got ready to go home and my headband was missing. I thought I took it off and put it in my coat pocket. Oh well I have others.

Mom Visit

Visited Mom tonight and sister with niece plus puppy arrived to discuss Christmas cards. Told Mom about new job I start Saturday. On the way home, stopped for gas and had to refill air in tire. In pitch darkness, it took a minute to remove the cap (take glove off) and refill the tire.

Had a lovely dream. I was standing in an empty retail space with kitchen in the back and large windows facing a street. I was so happy. Soon I was putting up display cases and shelves, next came fridge for cakes and another for to-go meals. I had coffee, slushy, and ice cream machines. I had a few tables and booths put in. I did a health inspection and one room was used to make candles and crafts, not for food. Then I was training my roommates how to cook my recipes and use the new cash register. It was a nice dream.

Another Rejection

Got a rejection notice on my phone answering machine. They hired someone with more experience. Of course they did. Wonder if this other company will ever give me an answer on my job application. I'm about to start a new job this weekend.

Met new manager

Well I met the new manager today. Been here 2 days now. So far they have rearranged the office so I can't find anything. Then she disliked wasting key folders we made for a group. Usually when 2 people are in a double bed room, we give a key holder for each person in the room. Well, they want 1 key holder with all the occupants names in the cover. OK I think that is lazy and unprofessional, but what do I know when I just a supervisor.

Oh, I forgot about the garland wreath someone put up on the front desk. New manager took it down cause decorations at front desk are against hotel standards.

Had a coworker on the brink of tears how they can't pay their rent cause they were cut to 20 hours a week. I suggested to ask getting hours in banquets, restaurant, or even housekeeping. Then they rehired an employee and I am so happy to see them. Manager who made the schedule says next week we are over 40 payroll hours so please take vacation. Yeah, I'm going to run out of paid time off and can't find a job that pays enough to live on.

Wonder when my hotel will put up the Xmas decorations this year, perhaps after a guest complains like last year. They are sitting in storage. I'm told Sales will put up the decorations.

Also forgot when I saw Interns wearing their winter coats at the front desk and offered to plug in my space heater from home for them. Explained to new manager how the old hotel space heater broke and general manager refused to purchase a new one. They said they will buy a new one. We had a negative review already from a guest complaining about the front desk workers wearing winter coats cause the building is so cold. I noticed the break room was a lot warmer today. Usually it's freezing and I shiver eating my food.

Happy Birthday Niece

Happy Birthday to Niece #1 who turns 37 today. And I never sent her a birthday card. I ran out of cards at home and all my money has to go toward house mortgage and gas for the car. Sure I could have written Happy Birthday on a blank card, but I was busy getting ready for Black Friday on my online shop.

Well, I got all the house decorations put out and just need to do the yard lights. I will wait until this weekend when it's warmer.

Set to do on boarding paperwork on Friday. Please God let me get another job offer from these financial places so I don't have to go.

New Manager

Well we got a new Rooms Operations Manager to take over the management of the Front Desk. Weird title for Front Desk Manager, but whatever. I wonder how long this one will last and how much they will rearrange and torture us changing everything before they quit. Please God let me leave this hotel. I can't afford to stay, I need bigger paychecks. And a stable schedule would be nice.

Someone said if given the choice between a happy puppy or the sad puppy covered in poo, I would naturally pick the happy puppy.

Actually this person doesn't know me at all. I would pick the old dog facing the wall convinced nobody will adopt them cause they need love the most. I have nobody to impress with a happy puppy.

I want to scream. Finally got a job offer, from the job I didn't want. I always get hired to do jobs nobody else wants cause they suck. Of course I will accept it and do it cause nobody will hire to do the job I do want. And people can't understand why I am so unhappy. Let me try to explain. Employers refuse to hire me to do the jobs I want to do. I would love to work in an office, but I am not good enough for them. I don't fit into their company culture. I don't have the correct experience. So no job for me. That is why I don't work jobs that would make me happy. Employers refuse to hire me.

I got bills to pay so I need to work even if I hate it until the day I quit cause nobody else is going to pay my bills for me. I have empty cupboards and no money to buy food cause all money I get from paycheck advances this week for has to pay the mortgage. I have to close my shop after Christmas cause I can't afford to keep buying supplies when people don't buy my stuff (many people want it for free which cost me money).

I am so depressed.

If you wondered, it's the shuttle van driver job at another hotel. Part-time working 2 days a week so not quitting my current job.

Gotta Love It

Just love it when people say it's sad we have to work on holidays. Yeah, I'm here to serve your a##. Why don't you stay home and I will stay home? Deal?

Got laundry done, dishes done, and Christmas boxes brought upstairs. Now to spend next few days decorating my house for Christmas. And my heart is broken. I don't have a furbaby to jump into the boxes. Still trying to get rid of these fleas. 3 crawled on my hand today. I grabbed and drowned them. Nothing else works. I can't bring a new pet into my home until they are gone. And get a new job so I can afford the shelter adoption fee. Please pray for me.

Happy Black Friday

It's retail management favorite day fo the year, they love it so much that work 12 hour shifts. Everyone else working retail today it's the worst day of the year. After Covid, they started opening at 5 AM again like they did when I worked retail. Once I left, stores started opening 8-9 PM Thanksgiving night. Then Covid happened so went back to 5 AM openings. How they world changes over the years. I slept in and went to work. Football team arrived before my shift. I was told to wear their school colors to welcome. Yeah, I will wear what I want. I was asked where my school colors were and I answered they were in the laundry. I found out who they were playing and joked I should have worn the opposing team's colors. Well, they leave tomorrow. Have more teams coming in next week. What joy is mine. Sold a few items. I'm not allowed to advertise cause No Soliciting policy that creates a Conflict of Interest and Favoritism. Please God let me get a new job and blow this hotel. I am sick of working here.

Happy Thanksgiving

I woke to cooked Brown and Serve rolls for roommate. Then went to brother's house for dinner. Aunt and Out of Town sister came over. My in town sister went to her in-laws for the holiday. Mom back in skilled care building so can't leave (they say if she can leave then she doesn't need skilled care). Aunt got upset how nursing homes changed since her husband was in one. They don't have nursing homes anymore, It's Independent LIving, Assisted Living, and Skilled Care. Mom took a fall getting up on her ownto cut her head. Skilled care sent her to hospital who sent her back to skilled care. Family left to visit Mom. I had to go to work.

Old employee came over from Texas to visit her family here. Her sister now works in the kitchen since last summer. She loves my beaded merchandise. Got asked if I had items for a man who is 60 years old. Honestly, I don't know what a 60 year old man would want that I could make by hand. I showed my Grinch and Snowman keychains, but no. Any ideas?

Football team is coming tomorrow and told to wear their team colors to welcome them. I replied, I will wear whatever I want.

Just love it when people comment how sad it is I work holidays. Yeah, I'm here to serve you. Why don't you stay home and I will stay home? Deal?

Preparing for Thanksgiving

Wow, an intern mentioned Thanksgiving tomorrow. I never thought of inviting the interns to experience their 1st American Thanksgiving dinner with my family or take them Black Friday shopping. Been dealing with getting ready for Black Friday on my online shop, going on 3 interviews, visiting Mom in the hospital who will be going to skilled care, then working myself. The intern commented how manager cut them down to 20 hours a week and unsure how they will pay bills now. Welcome to my world. At least I have PTO to use to make up lost hours. I suggested asking to work in banquets or the kitchen to get hours.

I spent hours in the kitchen cooking a turkey, stuffing, turkey gravy, and cornbread for Thanksgiving day. Used up the butter making stuffing so bought more so roommate can make mashed potatoes tomorrow. Then roommate complains for me to do the dishes. The sink is full and my dirty dishes from cooking for 6 hours are on the counter. I spent hours driving them aroudn town to donate plasma so they can buy a vapor, then cooked for 6 hours. Sorry, dishes will wait. I'm pooped.

Turkey was moist and delicious. Roommate refuses to eat it cause I cooked it witht the organ bag inside. I'm sorry the inside was stll frozen (I thawed it for 3 days int eh fridge) and legs with tied down with a piece a plastic so couldn't get it out before cooking. He complained it's processed turkey not real turkey. Excuse me, what kind of turkey did he expect coming from a grocery store? We don't have wild turkeys here roaming around to shoot, except for the whiskey brand.

Another Interview

Had another interview for Administrative Assistant. This one for a CPA firm. Hopefully hear from someone by the end of next week.

Interesting. Went to Target and used my canvas bags. Cashier put the canvas bags aside, gave me my total, gave me my change, and then went on to the next customer putting their items in plastic bags. So I stood there bagging my own groceries while they rang up someone else and when I walked away, cashier wished me a Happy Thanksgiving. Had similar experience at HyVee but then a bagger came up to bag so I stopped and paid while they finished. If a bagger failed to come, the cashier helped bag until finished before starting another sale.

Interesting. Made an online appointment to get my oil changed. Received text message and email confirming the appointment from the manager. Arrive and they didn't know I was coming and don't have time for me. Oh, but they will do the short oil change anyway.

Fun at work

I missed a fun weekend. Key coders not working when they are brand new. Large group arrived after midnight so engineer stayed late to make sure rooms were okay. Another night the engineer left early and people complaining about room too hot/cold had to change rooms or be given blanket/fan if refused to move. Then we had groceries delivered to guest and since there was no name on the slip, employee helped themselves and took them home. Guest who came looking for them was compensated and reordered.

Late leaving work today. 1st no shuttle driver scheduled between 1-4 so stayed until the next driver arrived. Then driver was 27 minutes late and I got tired of waiting. Restaurant manager can drive if needed (He arrives at 4). I texted messaged the driver to have no answer. I texted the general manager saying I wasn't working a 16 hour shift and was leaving.

Yippee. Got another interview set up for tomorrow.

Interesting. Went to Walmart and saw a pick up truck in the parking lot covered in Christmas lights.

Update: Shuttle driver was using vacation time as to why they didn't show up. Why the manager scheduled them to work when on vacation, I don't know.

No Dishwasher on Black Friday

I want to cry. I was hoping to get bills paid off and would be able to save money to buy a dishwasher on Black Friday. Well, delivery, installation, and hauling away old dishwasher doubles the price so I won't have enough money to buy a dishwasher until I get a better paying job. I also need a new toilet seat, new eyeglasses, and new microwave but don't have much money to buy food so can't afford any of those either. Please God let me get hired, I am so tired of praying.

Got my supplies for Christmas items so working on those this weekend. Then realized my car insurance is gettign paid on Monday and I will be bouncing a check so can't buy food. Pulled out more money out of my retirement funds to pay for the car insurance. Pray it shows up in my account on Monday or I will be paying a overdraft and less money to spend on food on Tuesday.

2 interview, 1 day

Shuttle driver interview was awkward. All he asked was I am still interested and willing to work the hours. Everything else was he explaining the job and hotel systems. I had no questions to ask.

2nd interview for secretary at financial place went well. 40 minutes. Should hear from them in couple weeks.

Went shopping with the $30 I have on my prepaid debit card. Got bare necessities and ingredients to make cocoa mix to sell. I plan to offer a snowman made of jars filled with cocoa mix, marshmellows, and peppermint candy pieces in the 3 jars. Roommate says I should close down my shop cause people aren't buying enough to make a profit. I'm losing money every holiday I make stuff for. Work won't let me advertise so it is getting harder to sell to people who love my stuff. Nobody has bought a candle since last November. I make reels and get 500 views and not one sell. Well, I was hoping to sell at next year's farmer market and get my name out there. Maybe I will shut it down after Christmas. I have to try.

Need space heater at work

Hotel is so cold you need a coat in the breakroom. Brought a space heater from home, but it refused to turn on. When finally got it to turn on, had to use low setting to run it, but then the cold air blowing in the door knocked out the heat. Turned it up to high and it shut off after a few minutes. Couldn't get it to turn back on. Have to bring my other one next time I work. Roommate complaining how cold the basement is where his room is. I bought him a new space heater. They are handing out turkeys for Thanksgiving for hotel employees. I already got one with the buy a ham, get a free turkey. I will keep to eat on Christmas.

Hosting some conference all over the lobby floor. Had several people attending the conference demand hotel parking cause it was too cold to park across the street (excuse me, across the street is where my car is parked). Explain they have to have a room to use the hotel parking (need a room key to get into the building from garage). No exceptions for non-guests. Guests complained how cold the lobby was as they attended a conference in the ballroom and atrium.

Yippee! Got 2 phone messages asking to set up interviews as secretary. And interview for shuttle driver tomorrow. Why do my interview always arrive in 3's. And I realized I forgot to grab the hotel free turkey. Better remember to pick it up tomorrow.

Possible sale

Have some joker messaging me wanting to buy items off my website. He wants to buy directly from me. Explained my website is buying directly from me. If they think I'm shipping out stuff to a stranger with a promise to pay, or get my Wallet account name so they empty it later, they have another thing coming.

Funny, had club member demand valet parking when we no longer do it or at least free hotel parking which is very limited and not free. Forcing them to park in a garage across the street was unacceptable. They're special.

Nice, getting hours cut next week cause we are overstaffed from business going down for winter. Good thing I didn't use up my vacation. Please God let me have an office job getting holidays and weekends off plus day hours. I have a job interview for hotel shuttle driver that is part-time working weekend evenings. Don't really want the job but I need extra money.

Mystery solved

After 3 years, someone working in the kitchen finally told me what type of cheese they put in breakfast buffet eggs to make them so delicious. It's cheddar.

Funny. Had the complaint line tells us someone complained their room was cold during their visit, never went above 59 degrees. Checked into it and they never complained about the cold room (we have a web app to tell engineers and housekeeping of problems and nothing reported for that room during their stay dates). OK, what compensation would you like for never telling us your room was cold and never gave us a chance to send the engineer to your room to change the room to heat? I'm letting management handle that one.

Happy Birthday Niece

Trying to come up with a Black Friday special. Free shipping. Free gift. Discount. What would make you spend $25 at my shop? Thinking of selling cocoa mix. Would you buy cocoa mix or chocolate bomb from me?

Happy Birthday to my niece turning 21 at last. She can now rent a car (some places), rent a room, gamble, buy alcohol, buy vapors, and buy cigarettes. Though she has to pay higher car insurance rates until age 25. Years ago I said when she turned 21, I would take her to a bar. Her father is taking that honor of taking her to her first bar. Must teach responsible drinking habits. I told to be careful about the sugar in alcohol because she has diabetes and needs to restrict her sugar intake.

Possible new manager

Heard we have a possible new front desk manager coming in, 2 possible candidates. Which means the task force manager is going to their next hotel. I wonder how long this new manager will last. Have to give the task force manager a farewell gift.

Funny guest of the day. Had a guest leave a negative review saying the 1st night of their stay, the room was freezing cold. I checked into it. The guest never told the staff the room was cold from being set on A/C. The next day when they complained, we noted to engineering to change the room to heat. And ta da, problem was fixed.

Full House

Enjoying the evening of 2 football teams staying so front desk is boring with a dozen people checking in. There is wedding party here too.

Return to work

Back to work and walked into a sh**storm. Have a group having a conference here so they all want late check out and a football team arriving who wants early check-in. Both groups were told no and housekeeping is hustling to clean rooms. Then tomorrow another football team arrives and both teams will be taking up most of the hotel. Oh, manager got mad at me for helping the shuttle driver out cause I should never leave my counter. Excuse me, but screw the customer who were waiting for the shuttle for 15 minutes cause a flight crew needs a ride in 30 minutes is unacceptable to me. 2 coworkers were at the desk so I wasn't abandoning it.

Baking ham. Thought it was pre-cut, then out of the package I realized it was the scoring pattern not pre-cut. It's been a while since I cooked a ham. It took nearly 4 hours to cook to get the correct temperature of the meat. Turned up the heat and took off the tin foil. Ham should have been done in 2 hours. Turned out nice and moist. Delicious, even my roommates loved it.

Today is my cat cats Bilbo and Misty's birthday. If they had lived, they would have turned 6. Life is so unfair. People say The Lord Provides. My kindness to the roommates will be rewarded. Lord doesn't provide for me very well and have yet to be rewarded for taking in my roommates. Can't find a better paying job. Denies jobs to my roommates so they can't help out. My cupboards are bare and any money I earn with cash advance has to go to an oil change or my car will break down and can't get to work. Next paycheck is tomorrow so that will help. Paying off my medical bill from my ear wax build up. Paying off one student loan next month. Then mortgage goes up $200 whuch really is goign to hurt. That's less money I have to spend on food, gas, insurance, and utilities. Which do I cancel first, the electric, phone, or water when I need all of them. Turn off the electric and pipes will freeze causing a flood and can't use internet or landline phone and have to recharge phone wilth car battery. Turn off landline phone and lose internet too. Cell phone internet is super slow if it connects at all and portable modem doens't connect. Sure I could use library internet or use stores' internet, but have to drive over there to use it so use more gas for car. Can't turn off the water cause I need that to flush the toilet, shower, wash dishes, and drink when run out of other beverages. Where am I going to get water? I would have to drive there and hope none of it spills in the car.

Day off

Today is exercising, dishes and laundry that I had to stop until I bought more dryer sheets. Finished my spy caper. 13 pages so need to weave more adventures into the story. And break it up into chapters. Anyone have a good spy story title. Anything I come up with already been used for a novel or movie.

I had a dream of holding a ferret. Also dreamed my house was renovated finishing the basement to add a bathroom plus enlarging my bedroom closets. My dining room were connected with an addition to the house. Yeah, I need to win the lottery or sell rights to my stories for a million dollars before I have money to do something like that.

Working on a story

Working on my spy caper story. I haven't touched it since last April, which was when I was declared my bankruptcy. My sister loves James Bond so writing it for her. I doubt she will read it, but it will be dedicated to her like my trilogy was dedicated to my eldest nieces and Southern Belle story dedicated to my fourth niece. Nephew doesn't read so haven't written a story for him yet. I thought of a Chinese man coming to America in the 1800's or a horror story of a zombie getting together with vampires.

Happy Veterans Day

Decided to start exercising again. Haven't moved for weeks so nice and sore after half hour of stretching. Hope to feel better soon. Took roommates to grocery store to use their food stamps. They actually bought food off my list this time. They bought a whole pineapple instead of the canned kind. Can't use fresh pineapple to cook my ham so have to get that tomorrow when I buy the non-food itmes. Can't get cash from the bank cause it's closed for the holiday.

Dear God, why do you hate me so much? Roommate says God is testing me. All I can ask God, Are you done testing yet? Have I passed or failed? I get 3 interviews in 1 week and you just can't let me have 1 job offer. You can't can't let my roommates get jobs and that would help me out so much if they paid rent. I am so tired that getting anything done is difficult. All I want to do is sleep all day. I had plans to rake the yard and it keeps raining. I want a pet so badly and that might lift my spirits, but can't get rid of these fleas for 2 months now. I am tired of praying that I can't pray anymore. Nothing ever changes.

Sunday Funday

Connected with an old manager on my contact liist last night. He is looking for a night auditor. Apparently he went back to his old hotel, the same one we met and where I was demoted at. I asked if the same $@!* GM was still there. He's retiring and they are waiting for a new GM. Not taking chances working that place again. Probably get screwed over again. He understood.

Went to church and had lunch with brother's friends. This time one had their grandson visiitng them so they joined us. I swear I am having a mental breakdown. After all theose interviews and no job offer, my nerves are shot. 5 interviews in one week is a bit much. I want to sleep all day. Roommate broke his cigarette lighter in a rage and started shouting to help clean the house. I picked up the living for vacuuming (roommate did the vacuuming) and cleaned the bathroom.

Put away the Halloween decorations. Still waiting for my blow up Mickey to dry. Need to toss my Jack o'lantern. Got to remove the tea light cup first.

Wow

Well, found out the Executive Housekeeper was let go last Monday. And a bunch a housekeepers called in the next day. I don't know how many quit. Wow, chief engineer quit and now head housekeeper is gone. Who else is going to leave.

Call for an interview

Another job interview set up for Monday afternoon. Account manager this time. I keep trying.

Update: Excitement bubble just burst. Investigated the client address I am interviewing at. Currently home of a software engineer whose only business website is on Instagram, Facebook, and LinkedIn. They do application development, web graphic design, and digital marketing. But don't have their own website. Found them on Chamber of Commerce. Another thing popped up in the search. They were found guilty of insurance fraud by falsifying insurance polices to get better commission. They got probation and restitution. This happened in 2018. Probably explains why "People with Criminal Records are Encouraged to Apply" in the job ad. Now I don't want to go to the interview.

I sent the staffing agency a message that I am not going to the interview. I don't want to work for a criminal of a possibly fraudulent company. I probably won't get paid or go to jail for it. I want a real job from a real company.

Oh wait, a website was listed but my computer refused to open it cause it was unsecure and too slow to open.

Work Day from Hell

Today at work was miserable. General manager had new locks placed on all doors. But this takes a week to complete so half are changed by today. So we have to make 2 keys for everyone for old and new system. Gym, pool, and parking garage are old system. Discovered new system only work with specially marked keys. 99% of front desk keys don't have this special mark. Plus, old system is on one computer and new is on another computer. No lunch today cause I was busy trying to figure all this out and get work done. Had a coworker working on their training on the computer who can't do anything without help so I wasn't to ask them for help.

Visiting Mom

Visiting Mom today. I was going to take her to her Bible Study, but dryer ended as I was going to leave so I had to shuffle the laudnry to be too late to take her to her Bible Study. So she didn't go. Stayed for her dinner. She needs to have someone making sure she eats and she has puree food so need to be there to make she doesn't choke. Usually my sister or brother do it, but I have vacation so giving them a break. We had a good talk and I ate her ice cream (had Oreo cookie pieces).

Rejection Notice

Got the rejection notice from the photo studio. They actually said they are looking for someone with more management experience. Then why did these people interview me?

Election Results

You get what you elect. Goodbye abortion rights. Goodbye to vaccinations. Goodbye Department of Education. Hello inflation that follows tariffs. Hello women dying from miscarriages. Jan 6 capitol attackers get pardons. And the extremists wanting civil war will just have to wait. At least he can't run for a 3rd turn unless you all are planning to throw away the US Constitution. Oh so many think he is the Son of God who is going to save us. He didn't save us last time he was in office so why would he now. Last time his administration was full of CEOs who destroyed their departments they reigned over. World leaders got favor paying for hotel rooms at his hotel. Which is against the Constitution to profit from the presidency. Even his daughter and son-in-law were allowed in the government which is against federal law back in the 1060's when Kennedy has his brothe ras attorney general. Look it up. He is a false prophet, a con artist, the devil's cabana boy. Not the Savior you think he is. But people never want to release their delusions. They will follow him to jail or over a cliff. And he will praise their devotion upon their death. Nice guy.

Photo Study Tour and Interview

Went to interview at photo studio. Went well. Decision will be made tomorrow. Have to travel to Wichita, KS for a week of training as studio photographer and complete training at mall studio. Not sure I want the job since outside Christmas the studio is dead. Pressure to meet sales demands from corporate will be hard. Came home to hyperventilate in a full blown panic attack complete with tremors. Took a few minutes to calm back down.

Roommate has a new idea. He is going to use his grill ashes and make soap to sell or use in the house. He asked me to buy him lye, but I said my grandma used ashes to make lye. How does he do that? I told him to watch a video online. Believe me, videos making anything exist. He is not following an online recipe and trying to figure out his own. He's using ash lye, bacon grease, and water. His first batch had too much water. Next two batches he used tap water instead of fridge water. Fridge water is filtered and much better for soap than tap water. In fact, online recipes say to use distilled water but I don't have any in the house. But he has to figure out eveything out the hard way. He just can't use someone else's recipe for soap.

No Interview

So no video interview today. She got someone out of state to come to to do the final in person interview and studio tour. Have to wait until Tuesday. They called and gave me homework. I need to call other studios in the district and ask what it is like to work there. Yeah, I can go on Glassdoor for that. Then want me to bring photos of my work with one showing emotion. OK, all on my smartphone.

Worked on dishes, checking email, and writing in my journal. 3 more days left of vacation. Then work 2 days, and then get seven days off. Using up my vacation days before I quit. Hopefully I will be quitting soon.

Master of Weird Dreams

I am the master of weird dreams. Relaxing in my living room watching a TV about White House bunkers and had a vision walking through building hallways. Lots of people in suits are around me and a woman directs me where to go. I am introduced to Kamala Harris and shake her hand. Suddenly I don't want be there. President Biden enters the room to meet me and asks what's wrong when I don't respond to his outreached hand. I am shaking as I drift to standing at the bottom the capitol gleaming in sun and it's on fire. People are screaming on the street and tiny planes are firing rockets. Windows are shattered as bombs explode. I start hyperventilating and snap out of my trance to notice the President in front of me. I reach my hand out to shake his saying I am pleased to meet him. He is nervous shaking my hand. Get out my camera and prepare to do their portraits for their Christmas cards. I have them sit in the office and in front of a Christmas tree with family then get escorted out to have a staffer arrive saying the capitol was under attack. I am pulled back in and guided through halls, kitchen, and down stairs in a basement room. Later I am allowed to leave and look out the window of a hotel to see the black smoke from capitol burning. Then dream ends. Fat chance of that happening.

Another Interview

Finished 2nd in person interview this morning. Nerves are shot. Now wait for video call for another company. Email questions, phone interview, and now video call interview. How many questions does person need to ask to make a decision to hire someone.

Mental Breakdown

Told my roommate about my vacation being used up before task force manager leaves or I quit. This also means no cash advances on hours I am not working. We may have to do food delivery to pay for food during my vacation. He asked why I would do something like that if we need money. I am trying to get another job and from quitting twice at this hotel, I will not get my vacation pay accured on my last paycheck. Besides, I am on the edge of a mental breakdown from the wacky schedule and hit/miss days off. I need time to decompress. Oh, will I be cleaning during my time off. I will clean my time off and he gave me $20 if I would start helping clean the house. I am completely exhausted and have 3 panic attacks a day from the stress. Well, he and his girlfriend got us signed up for food stamps for 3 months so that should help a little. I told them to try retail who are hiring for Christmas.

I also informed him that I took money from my retirement again to pay the mortgage and funds are running so low that if I lost my job I would not be able to support us for a month. Explained that when I run out of money, he will be asked to leave. He better pray I get a better paying job. He became eager to apply to busniess near my hoouse so he can walk to work. He is gettign tired of staring at walls all day. Nobody is hiring, but always taking applications. Just a while ago I took his girlfriend for a job interview of a fast food place opening soon. She didn't get the job.

Well, today after calling 4 businesses to be told they are not hiring, he threw his phone in frustation and the screen shattered all over the kitchen floor. He started shouting at me that turned into tears how he is trying to get a job, but nobody will hire him. I keep giving him a bad attitude every time he asks a favor or for a ride, plus don't help clean the house that his friends complain how dirty it is. I give him a hug and apologize. I sweep up the plastic on the floor and promise when I get a new job that I will get him a new phone (I once promised a bicycle when pay off debt then get vet bills that will take a year to pay off). All he hears is excuses from me trying to recover from trauma of my bankruptcy, my pets dying from fleas, and trying for 2 years to leave this hotel. Daily panic attacks 3 times a day are wearing me out. I go days without brushing my teeth and can't recall last time I combed my hair (I keep it twisted in a bun). I told him he now knows how I feel being overwhelmed and nothing ever changes. My suffering never ends no matter how much I pray. He says I have no idea how he feels (I'm getting a good idea now).

I don't know what to do anymore. Please God, give us jobs.

Happy Halloween

Sweet. Had my 1st kid in a pumpkin costume. Father thanked me for doing the Teal Pumpkin cause so few people in on the city do it. I noticed when I put in my address most places were were in the suburbs.

Had 13 kids Trick or Treating tonight. Cars kept coming up to the house. I think I was the only house with the porch light one on my block. Kids go to the mall or church Trunk or Treat so kids don't want around door to door in the city like rural towns do. Neighbors stopped handing out treats cause not enough kids come. Well, if I get only 1 kid at my door, I will make Halloween special for that 1 kid.

Company Interested in Me

OMG, I'm freaking out and hyperventilating.

Hi Jordan,

I enjoyed speaking with you about the position & would like to move forward with you in the selection process. I will be in touch this week to schedule a video meeting with you. Please let me know if there are any days/times that I should avoid.

Gi to work and Oh, how nice. We have quality control arriving today so no candy on counter and no costumes. Can't have my beaded stuff in view. Well thank you for ruining our holiday mf. Good thing I am wearing my interview suit today and interview make up. Everything must be hotel standards so no kleenex box on counter, no decorations, and must wear name tag. I have been back a year and they still haven't given me name tag. 1 interview today and trying to set up the other 2. Wish me luck. I am on edge of a nervous breakdown. Wacky schedule, hit and miss days off, and it's wearing me out. Taking vacation to use them up before I quit and task force manager leaves.

Update: Interview set up for Friday. Now wait to set up the 3rd.

Well, interview didn't happen cause the work computer kept kicking me off while trying to print papers to leave. 2 minute task took 15. Plus soaking wet pants from driving the shuttle and trying to find people in the rain. Next I dropped something and bending over to get it my travel cup pop spills all over my stuff. And I am missing my cat ears. Can't drive to place in 5 minutes (other side of town) so went home and freaked out at my roommate from my bad day. Rescheduled interview for tomorrow. Thank God they let me reschedule and I got tips. And my cat ears I left at the front desk so went over to pick them up.

Update: Went to my interview the next day and it went well. Cash office job.

Beggars Night Postponed

Trick and Treating is postponed a day due to storms predicted for Wednesday. I just bought my pumpkin and candy. Oh well, I can wait another day to carve my Jack O'lantern. I have an interview tomorrow after work.

Phone Interview

Had phone interview with job #3. They want to interview me at the office on Wednesday. X fingers. Job #2 I had to give up on when they never answered when to come in for an interview. Didn’t want the job anyway so doesn't matter. I will take either of these other jobs, but of course I want the one that pays more.

Internet went out

Internet went down last night so forced to go to bed. Got it back while I was sleeping. Phone interview today. By morning the internet was back.

Well that was fun. Call the number I was given for the phone interview today and they never answered their phone. Rang and rang to get voicemail. Emailed asking if there was a better time to call or were they no longer interested in talking to me. My goodness, what a jerk. And people can't figure out why getting a job is so hard.

Update: 1 hour later they called me. Apparently their photographer needed help with a crying newborn. They were forgiven and had a pleasant conversation. Their manager is quitting from too much stress from everyone quitting and running a 3 camera room studio by themself. Sales are terrible even with 3 camera rooms (probably from mall declaring bankruptcy and anchor stores closing). Got a couple part-time photographers hired, but then personal problems made work problems worse. So they are quitting to focus on family. They want a retail manager they can train as a photographer. Seems backwards, but okay. They have to be sales person, receptionist, and photographer on top of being the manager. X fingers.

Guest Concern

Had a guest express concern over another guest eating breakfast with a gun in a holster in plain view and thought it was sad someone needed a gun at breakfast. Told them they were probably a cop. Well they were unsure of our weapons policy for guests. I said I would bring it to management attention. Asked General Manager if law enforcement were staying here and they said yes. I thought so.

Fun day. Concert postponed so bunch of cancellations. Then coworkers think they can write their own schedule to come and go when they want. Management got a complaint. When I get left alone holding the bag, I complain.

Job Possibilities

Interesting. Received an email from employer I applied to asking a series of questions to be replied to. Are employers skipping phone interviews now? I tried to be eloquent in my reply answers.

Update: Yippee. I got a reply for a phone interview. X fingers.

Even better, another employer asked for an interview. Problem is I don't want this job, but it is more money. Praying I get the first job, but have to keep options open.

More interesting. This 1st phone interviewer wants me to call them. I'm used to employers taking the time to call the applicant. Very unorthodox hiring process here.

Even more interesting. Job #2 won't email me back when to come in for an interview. Now have another employer wanting to do a phone interview. Hopefully Job #3 will email back a time to do it.

Got a phone interview for #3 on Monday. #2 won't answer when to come in. Guess I have to give up. That's ok, didn't really want the job, I need to make more money.

Trouble Brewing

Had to play referee between coworkers not getting along, one cussed at the other in front of guests and me. Told her to email HR, which they did. Told the other I can't have cussing in the lobby. They apologized. Had to email management to help get this resolved.

Marathon going by my hotel

Geesh. Get to find out from marathon runners checking in that our hotel street will be blocked for the race tomorrow. And marathon people never said a word. Manager had to pull a map from the internet for guests and employees driving around during the race starting at 8 AM. I put a map by the time clock. Copied the map for guests at the entrance. I don't work so don't have to worry where to park.

Wow, filling out job applications and one employer asks flat out what is my sexual orientation and if I am transgender. OK, isn't that illegal to ask if your applicants are homosexual and/or transgender people? I stopped the application process and exited. I don't want to work for an employer who asks illegal questions. I checked into online and it is legal to ask if the question is optional. Trust me, there are no optional questions from employers if you want a job from them.

Dreams of Cats

I keep having dreams of a yellow cat, gray cat, and a small brown dog running around the house. No ferret in the dreams. I miss my ferrets. I'm still hurting from my cats loss. I see the closet spot where Misty hid from fleas and cringe. I open the cupboard where I keep plastic bags for garbage and pop bottles and remember Bilbo and Misty loved chillaxing in there like Frodo did. Why did they have to stop eating causing their severe anemia from the fleas? Fleas are getting better. Maybe by Christmas I look into animal shelters, I'm not ready yet. I have to save for a new dishwasher first. Thinking Black Friday for that.

I checked into prices for pop up lease at a local mall. Way too much money and only have a couple weekends available during the holiday season. Oh well. It was worth a shot inquiring on pricing.

Task force manager staying a little longer

Task force front desk manager is staying another month. Of course I was happy, they do take a lot of stress off my shoulders. She was telling me how they leap frogged from being a hotel restaurant server to front desk to front desk manager in a month without any prior hotel experience.

Wow, I've work the same job for years and never got a promotion until I quit for another job at another company. No hotel would hire me from no hotel experience until Covid when they were desperate for people. Then stayed as night auditor for years until I quit then forced to return and senior supervisor left to be promoted to supervisor cause front desk was in shambles from the mass exodus of front desk employees that occurred after supervisor left and they were desperate.

Special request

Had a guy ask for custom work cause my bracelets are too feminine. Yeah, don't do custom work for one person. I order a bunch of beads and get whatever they send, then make bracelets by color. The cost I have to spend to make custom work is not worth it for 1 sale.

What a morning

What a morning. Called police twice and kicked out someone trying to make a reservation. Bus driver complained someone parked in his spot. Cop ran the plate, but not a registered guest. I think they were with someone trying to check in early, but no rooms were cleaned yet. Then the person wanting to make a reservation didn't know what city he was in, failed to understand what was happening when I called the reservation line that has prompts, no ID, no credit card, no cell phone, and just wanted a room for a few hours and food. Then they asked for a ride from the people trying to check in. Told them to stop bothering my guests and leave. Then had a housekeeper report someone doing drugs in the restroom. Person left restroom before cop arrived.

Update: Then driver left at 1 PM and nobody scheduled until 4 PM. I got to drive the shuttle and supervise the front desk with manager assigning rooms to people waiting for early check-in. Returned from dropping off wedding guests and at least 20 people were in line to check-in. Wedding parties need to check-in the night before to have their changing rooms if the wedding is before 4 PM check-in

That is Mine

Had interns take beaded pens from my bag and I saw them on the counter. Oh, they thought they were free for everyone to take. Excuse me, I am the only one who uses beaded pens at the front desk. Explained I sell those. Then front desk manager had a box of a pink ribbon pins and rubber bracelets for a Pink Out Day on Oct 18th for Breast Cancer Awareness disappear from front desk office. She spent her personal money on that box to give out to employees, not company funds. And now, she has to buy another out of her own pocket. Crazy people. You ask if you don't know if something is for everyone or 1 person's item. You don't just grab stuff that don't belong to you cause it's sitting on a counter. That is called stealing.

Price I pay for being a supervisor

Poor driver went to the emergency room so I got to run the front desk with 2 interns who can't answer the phone without asking for help and drive the shuttle. Told them to radio the general manager if they need help when I took someone to the airport (our manager's day off). Made tips that will help pay for groceries. Not gonna cry about it. I only cry when people stiff me in tips.

My merchandise is popular

Ordered more beaded stuff supplies since my Halloween collection is so popular at work. Arriving tomorrow. Not allowed to solicit my wares at work (beeen doing for 3 years and now we have to follow hotel brand standards that forbid conflict of interest). So my wares sit in silence for anyone walking by to be observed. I am not told to put them away, but can't advertise them in the breakroom.

Back to Night Audit Shift

Did a night audit shift so other supervisor who normally covers the night auditor's nights off can take time off. Security guard arrived and commented how it was wonderful to see me again. He hasn't seen me for days. I asked if that meant I am more fun than the new night auditor. Well, I talk more to them than the night auditor does. Imagine that.

Roommate Lecture

Always fun to receive lectures from roommate, especially after work when completely exhausted and ready to fall asleep. I am not trying very hard to get rid of these fleas and my cats died so they are coming after us, I don't do dishes often enough and that's why we have bugs, and finally hours after returning from the grocery store, he asked me buy him something when I have no cash to buy anything. I heard him ask me to take him to the store, but missed the part where he expected me to pay. I pulled money from my bank account I need to pay mortgage to get TP, milk, and bread. I have 12 cents in my wallet. Then asked this while I was doing the laundry not fully paying attention. Sorry for not cleaning much from my daily panic attacks, stress over finances, mourning my cats, and having 2 mouths to feed who can't seem to get jobs close enough for them to walk. Sigh. Roommate asked if I was alright the other day when Iwas in a daze. I said I was fine. What is he going to do about anything?

Well girlfriend didn't make it to her interview because I was working and couldn't drive her across town. Her fake bus pass isn't ready yet.

Dear God, Get me another job please

Well we have another intern arrive. This hotel is so awful we can't hire people and have to grab people from another country who never had a job before and/or don't know how to use a computer to get people in here. Our only new hire this summer just took another job as a bartender and refuses to work night shifts anymore, which is the only shift they work. Task force people keep leaving. Look forward to our front desk manager leaving. Sorry, but someone here for 30 days changing all our routines and policies is a little irritating.

RIP Dame Maggie Smith.

Farewell to Charlotte Bartlett in Room with a View, Wendy Darling in Hook, Mrs. Medlock in The Secret Garden, Mother Superior in Sister Act, Gunilla Garson Goldberg in First Wives Club, Professor McGonagall in Harry Potter, Countess Trentham in Gosford Park, Lady Gresham in Becoming Jane, and Dowager Countess of Grantham in Downtown Abbey. A great light has gone out.

Late to work

Got to be late to work thanks to a train. The bridge that goes over the train is under repair until November.

Received the rejection email from the department store for the wrap gift job.

Picked up roommate fromt he airport. Ready to cut ties with his friend. Spent 5 days in a hotel in down in Texas going to the beach twice. And his friend wanted to wake and bake all the time. Roommate is trying to improve his life and his friend wants to drag him down into being daily drunk and stoned. Roommate wants to work cause tired of staring at walls all day and get his girlfriend a job so she can get an apartment of her own (or pay me rent). He is growing up and learning the hard way quitting jobs so much makes managers not want to hire him.

Another Interview

Funny. Waking up, but not wanting to get up I had a vision of my Bilbo swatting me with his paw telling me to get out of bed and get ready for my interview. My baby. Getting breakfast of spam and can corn, I thought I saw something move behind the counter. Must be the ghost dog I keep viewing. I have no more pets. I used to have 3 ferrets and 2 cats, but they were taken away from me.

Interview went well. Will hear from them by next Monday. X fingers.

Lovely. Driver complains about some guest being rude to them. Yeah, if I had to wait 40 minutes for a shuttle when it is in the sales contract I be picked up on time, yeah I might rude too. Then a guest calls right before the shuttle ends and driver refuses to go to the airport. I'll go. And I get stiffed with zero tip after lively conversation on the way to the hotel. Go home and a road I drive on is completely blocked. Great. Go 3 miles out of my way to find a road to take me home making my 15 minute trip into 30 minutes.

Dreams

Had a Misty dream last night. She was little girl with little golden wings calling for mommy. Then she came closer and Misty the cat started licking my face saying, Sorry Mommy I love you, but it was just my time and Bilbo is here too. A little boy with white robes appeared. Then Misty laughed and said something was coming, something I will always remember. I hope it's not another trauma I have to deal with.

Driver had a sister die recently so I helped cover the shuttle this weekend. Made enough tips to fill up my gas tank with change to spare. Have my interview tomorrow as receptionist to a law office. Wish me luck. $0.15 more per hour but I will take it.

Well roommate is gone until the 25th, back to Texas to visit his high school friend who paid for the ticket.

RIP Misty

RIP Misty. Misty was doing so well grooming herself, jumping up and down from the couch, purring, meowing, eating and drinking. This morning I gave her kibble in addition to her can food she ate last night. Roommate went back to his hometown this morning. I dropped him off at the airport. Went to work and half later roommate girl called me at work from Misty drooling under their bed and not moving. Took her to vet and she returned to normal (as normal with severe anemia). She was having a seizure from the anemia. They said again to get a blood transfusion for $3000 in a citty 45 miles away, which I can't afford. Otherwise they recommend euthanasia from her illness. First visit her red blood cells were 9%, now 12% so she is improving, but under 15% is critical. She is grooming herself, moving around (basement is a long walk), eating and drinking, I am not going to kill her. She needs more time to recover. Brought her home saying to watch her, pet her, make sure she eats and drinks. I offered her kibble this morning cause she doing better. Then went back to work. Roommate girl calls again as I'm leaving work. Misty is not breathing. She just came out of the shower and found her on the floor not breathing. I came to blow into her nose and pushed on her chest, but she didn't move. She was still movable so no death rigor yet so must have died right before I came home. She ate her kibble and a bowl full of water today. I don't understand how she was getting better then up and dies. I tried baby, everything I could do to help you. I tried to save you

.

Interesting night

Interesting night at work. Sales oversold rooms to a group so 20 people are getting 1 bed suites instead of 2 bed suites. Then oversold 2 rooms total so 2 people are going to another hotel. Then a task force needed to get her medication before leaving tomorrow and our shuttle driver refused to take her so I did. Map had it placed west of hotel, but was east so took longer than expected. Got a nice tip. Banquets has a spread of leftover food for employees to eat. The chicken was a little hard and dry, but food. Had pieces of watermelon too. Brought my own lunch which is a ham sandwich. How is your night?

Then on top of that a coworker tells she heard my cat died. She has kittens she needs to get rid of or they are going to the animal shelter. I have fleas, I have vet bills to pay back, and a cat just died less than week ago. Now is not the time to bring newborn kittens into my home. If people need to get rid of kittens, then they need to get their cat spayed. Misty is spayed, it's not that hard.

Woo-hoo! Moved Misty to the couch to present fresh water and food. She ate some of her food and had a drink of water. I am happy. She's coming back.

So happy at Misty's progress

Progress. Misty despised me syringe feeding her and jumped off the couch. She went over the end table to settle on my lazyboy. Changed her water and presented a new can of food. Hope she eats it tonight since she is feeling better to move around like that.

And they call it kitty love. Misty jumped out of her chair to lie down beside me taking a nap. Then after I woke up and turned around, she jumped on top of me. She is getting better.

Good Morning

Misty is doing better and drinking water. Last night I took to syringe feeding her the gravy part of her can food. I added water to the food to make more gravy. I slept with her on the sofa most of the night. I woke up to find her on the floor so moved her water and food to her then slept in my bed. This morning I took her can food to a blender to add water to make a smoothie to syringe feed her food. I presented 2 treats as I do every morning and she didn't even sniff it. I put back in the couch so she facing me as I read my emails. Got a call in the phone for another interview. I hope this means my luck is changing.

Thanks a lot whoever called Animal Protective Services. Pretty good idea who called and blocked them on social media. Roommate is mad I share too much with people I know. Either people are my friend or they are not. Simple. Officer agreed I am taking care of my pet and left. I have 3 people telling me I am incapable of taking of her properly. What am I not doing for her? I took them to the vet, sprayed the house with pesticide to kill, gave them flea med that is workign and fleas are going down. I am syringe feeding food and water. I bought a house fogger to kill the fleas. What else can I do? Please explain how I am failing my cat. Take away Misty from me would traumatize her into stop eating completely and kill her when she is vulnerable. If the vet wanted her to stay overnight to take care of her properly, I would have said yes and picked her up the next day.

Got a call from retail store and immediate phone interview. Part time work in addition to my full time job. She offered full time retail position that makes less than I do now. No thank you.

To the Vet Again

At vet cause Misty stopped eating. She had a little can food last night but plenty leftover this morning (4 oz can). Spoon fed it to her and she licked it but that was it. Took her outside. Covered in pee. She walked about 10 feet and collapsed to space out meowing. Fear of a rerun of Bilbo called sister and rushed to emergency vet. Her regular vet another 10 miles in West Des Moines. She perked up and making biscuits so hope I'm not too late. I just buried my Bilbo, I don't want to loose her too. Why did these cats have to stop eating so they can't fight the fleas when I gave them flea med to kill the buggers? Sprayed the house multiple times.

Update: Misty has anemia. Vet said cheap flea meds over time result in medical resistance in the fleas so they keep reproducing. Vet recommended a flea bomb. She is getting medicine to kill fleas and keep them off 3 months.

Home now. Misty had a spoonful of can food and drinking water. She got a Capstar that makes fleas drop off immediately and a topical med to be flea free for 3 months. Bought a flea fogger. Found a flea comb, but didn't have enough money for both so buy tomorrow. My roommate did the fogger and I took Misty outside.

Got called into work to drive the shuttle. F No. Told them I have an anemic cat who needs me. Vet said she needs calm so no trauma, no outside, no bath. She wants me with her or she meows.

Tried syringe feeding her her can can food mixed with water. Sleeping next to her on the couch tonight.

No more employee meals

Nice. They no longer cook meals for employees because of theft of food in kitchen so everything is locked up from now on. I find this out when I come to order to food as I have done the past 3 years. Oh they were supposed to send an email about that. Employee meals are now fixed in the morning and sit in a cooler all day so whatever is left is what I get to eat. The meal I order everyday is not there. Oh that isn't part of employee meals anymore. Excuse me? I have food allergies and can't just eat whatever bozo feels like making, that day. Why do people think I am such a picky eater? The employee meals are now exactly what they put into the gift shop to sell. Oh, if employee doesn't eat them then we can sell them to hotel guests. I just won't eat tonight.

Job interview

Video interview went well with HR person today. Next would be the in person interview with hiring manager. X fingers.

Newbie question

Had a newbie ask if it was OK when guests ask where certain places are located to tell them to look it up on Google.

Um, no, we don't ever say that to customers. It's rude and lazy. I understand she just arrived here and unfamiliar with the city, but if a guest asks a question, then we answer it. We offer to Google it for them or offer a map. And it is a great way to learn where things are. Plus she can ask me or the other supervisor who know the city.

Poor Misty is distressed losing Bilbo. Yesterday she pooped on bed twice and then getting her can food she peed on the table. Same thing happened when Precious died, Frodo peed in my laundry basket. Why did he have to go? Had another first with Misty. Petting her with paws on my shoulder in our cuddle time and roommate announces Misty is peeing on me. Then I felt wet. She got my hip and chair. Rubbed on vinegar.

I am the master of weird dreams. Lying down resting, I dreamed sitting on a beach looking at a sunset. I am wrapped in a warm blanket. Leonardo DiCaprio comes walking on the beach holding a wine bottle and 2 champagne glasses. He says hello and sits next to me. Says this a celebration. He hands me a glass and pours me red wine. I drop the glass pouring the wine into the sand. I say I don't feel like celebrating. He replies maybe this will make me feel better and hands me a Yorkie puppy. I hold the puppy saying, "Maybe". He puts his arm around my shoulder and sky grows dark into stars. He leaves saying it was nice to meet me. I wrap my blanket around me to go to sleep in the sand with my puppy.

Having Bilbo dreams and in a couple he was a small boy, the last he was in his cat form licking my face. Just comforting words how it was his time and Misty will be OK.

RIP Bilbo

Petted the cats and the flea med is working. No fleas or flea dirt in the fur. Though worried about Bilbo. I think fleas have weakened him. Misty acts normal, but Bilbo acts slow and not eating much. I squirted water in his mouth and petted him until he started drinking water on his own. He drank a half bowl of water. But he won't eat. Maybe he will start feeling better without the fleas and eat normal again.

RIP Bilbo. He was grew anemic from his fleas as his sister Misty got better. I petted him thinking his fleas were better and noticed he felt cold. Checked his gums and couldn't tell the difference between teeth and gums. I put him on my lap to warm him up. Then decided to give a flea bath. He jumped out and collapsed in the hallway. I put him in the tub again to finish rinsing the soap off. The water turned red with blood. His nose went in the water and saw bubbles. Held his head up and finally gave up. Dried him off and he meowed. There was a bunch of fleas on his chest his white fur turned pink. Call sister cause I can't afford a vet and maybe wait until tomorrow to see if he gets better. She said take him now. Went to emergency vet at midnight. He was not moving when pulled out the carrier and pulled him out of the carrier screaming "Give me a sign of life" and blew in his nose. Vet said he was already dead. At least I gave him pets before he died. Anemia or breathing in water, I don't know, but he is gone. I opened bag they put him in and fleas were jumping out of his fur.

In 2 months my Bilbo would have turned 6 years old. He was just a baby.

Back to night audit

Back on night audit duty for 2 nights cause other supervisor wanted a day off. It was like I never stopped. Good to be home. Both were peaceful nights.

Pending New Pet

My roommate is on a mission to capture a chipmunk to turn into a pet. Yeah, I had a chipmunk in my house years ago hiding under furniture and corners and got a rodent trap for it when it refused to leave after keeping the back door open for them for hours. All I caught was ferret Luthien who loved peanut butter. It was so funny looking at her tail sticking out of the back of the trap flap. Eventually the chipmunk left (when cats stopped chasing it around the house). Good luck.

So far this summer he has captured a garter snake, shrew, and frog in the backyard to become his pet and eventually let them go when he can't take care of them well without a job.

Cat in the Closet

Since fleas started biting, Misty has been taken residence in the closet. Oh my, I heard of skeletons in the closet, but a cat in the closet. Oh no, I have a feline closet case. I noticed since I put on the flea medicine the cats have been scratching less. Die Fleas Die. My poor roommate and I have to put on the flea foam to stop getting bit.

Cleaning Finished

Got my cleaning done. Well, cleaning I am going to do right now. Dusted everything, swept the floors, and cleaned out from under my bed with a ton of cat poop. Bilbo pooped under there when shut in the room after cat fights with visitor cat. The old sheets and sweatshirts I put under there for them to sleep on were soaked in urine. When I get new sheets, I will put the old ones with a couple rips and blood stains under the bed for them.

Missing Cat Again

Wake up and Misty still in closet (been in there since yesterday). Can't find Bilbo anywhere in the house. Open back door and Misty comes outside. No Bilbo. He was with me went to bed last night so where could be. I am trying to keep my stress down to lessen my panic attack ocuurances and this happens.

Yeah, Bilbo came into the living room. I don't know where he was, but just walked into the living room. Later I found him behind the front door as I shut it for the night. I have a glass storm door and open it for light since my living room is dark and let cats watch the birdbath nearby. I call it Cat TV.

Happy Birthday to Meeeeeee!!!!! Part 2

Great. My week keeps getting worse. I overslept and missed my job interview at the capitol. I waited for weeks for this interview and so excited last night about it. Had my outfit picked out. I went out with friends last night and left so I would get plenty of sleep. Wake up in the middle of night and can't go back to sleep for hours. Happy Birthday to me.

Had lunch at a restaurant with family who brought me a pink champagne cake. Had dinner with roommate and his girlfriend at my hotel restaurnt. Ordered pizza and strawberry margarita (my work bartender friend's drink was 100X better than the strawberry margarita at the other restaurant last night). My front desk manager saw us come in and paid for our dinner. Then as a free brithday cheesecake and chocolate martini arrived with lit candle in the cheesecake. My hotel restaurant does free things for birthdays and anniversaries. I never had a chocolate martini before, it tasted like chocolate milk with alcohol aftertaste. It reminded me of James Bond martini, Shaken not stirred. Happy Birthday to Me.

I thanked the front office manager for the free meal and got next week's schedule. Once I got home, my Mom called to wish me a good birthday since she was unwell for lunch. Now watching West Side Story (Steven Spielberg version). Had a good birthday.

Happy Birthday to Meeeeeeee!!!!! Part 1

Had a wonderful night with friends. Had a cheese sandwich, fries, and 4 margaritas. And engineer and banquet captain came by after work for a drink at the bar. Had to step away for interview tomorrow at Capitol building giving tours. Only 10 hours so extra money.

Why me?

I prayed and prayed for my trauma to end. I am waking up from my anxiety stupor and started cleaning the house this week. Now have to deal with fleas and literally have no money buy flea med nor groceries and my flea comb is missing. I do have spray from last time had fleas. Still works. All money is going to mortgage, car tags, and 1st of month bills. On vacation so no paycheck advances. I pray for help and get fleas.

Update: Flea foam doesn't last that long. Cats were scratching this morning so broke down to buy flea med. May bounce an auto payment but I have to take care of my furbabies. The store was out of flea combs.

Vacation Fun

Working on cleaning the house today. Cleaned the shower, ceiling fans, cobwebs, windows, mirrors, and glass pictures/doors. Paused to eat. I might get more done if my body would stop having panic attacks making my chest hurt and have to lie down. While I was bending over cleaning a window, I felt something touch my tush. Thought it was the cats, but when turned around there was nobody there. Roommate was in the basement. He laughed the ghost grabbed my tushy.

Where are You, Kitty?

Adventure of the morning was trying to find Misty after our yard time. Roommate found her meowing in the egress next to his basement room window. Wouldn't jump out the egress when offered treats (and yes she could have jumped up put of it), had to pull her out of it. Back inside.

Heart Attack for the Day

Had my heart attack for the day. Took cats outside on the patio in the morning. Misty went inside. Bilbo, I didn't see go inside but didn't see in the yard so thought maybe he went inside. Walk around local park trail, went grocery shopping, and come home to get ready for work. Didn't see Bilbo inside or outside. Went to work and come home. Open the can food and Misty came out to eat. But no Bilbo. Start hunting inside and outside checking back and front yards calling him. Roommate comes upstairs and starts looking for him. He finally sees him sitting outside in front of the sliding doors. He heard me calling him in the yards. Relief.

Conversation of the Day

Roommate: Becky.

Me: Yes.

Roommate: Hey Becky.

Me: Yes.

Roommate: Could you please come to the kitchen?

Me: Hang on. (Bump Bilbo off my lap). Sorry, I had cat in my lap.

Roommate: It's alright. Would you like some chicken?

Me: Sure.

Ch 7 Bankruptcy Discharge

Received the discharge papers for my Ch 7 Bankruptcy. The trustee never demanded any money to pay to keep my car so I don't have to empty my retirement fund to keep my car that my Mom bought for me. Now I get to pay income tax on that $50,000 credit card debt that got discharged next year. And if my Mom dies in the next 6 months, I have to report any life insurance money I receive. Not everything gets discharged. My mortgage I reaffirmed so any payments go on my credit report. I wasn't behind on that so no foreclosure for me. Then I have to pay income taxes I owe from taking out money from retirement to pay my credit cards last year. Then I have to pay my student loans and one increased the monthly payments so will be done with that in December. The other will take 5 years to pay off. At least hopefully have less stress and less panic attacks. Not complete stress relief, but some relief.

Grocery shopping

Saving all my money from work early pay for my mortgage due next week and I have to pull money from my retirement account to make up the shortage. Those doctor payments and A/C repair are really hurting me. With roommate gone my water bill went down $20 and saved money on food, but he is back with his girlfriend. He said on the way to the grocery store he shouldn't have quit his job or moved out into his friend's place. Friend kept promising to give him money then never gave it. He spent his days promising not to get drunk and then get drunk to flirt with his girlfriend. They did food delivery in his car and friend kept all the money earned. He never took him to his 2 interviews so he didn't get the job. He is trying to improve his life and sensed his friend was just using him for companionship since his wife broke his heart. He never received a phone call or even rejection email from the grocery store he interviewed at last Friday. Manager brought up him having a lot of jobs. I had to explain that makes him look flaky. Managers don't want to invest time and money to train him just to have him quit in 3 weeks. He replied he is learning that the hard way. I told him if I had his friend's money I would be doing something with my life instead of sitting onmy tushy drinking beer. I would open a bed and breakfast and catering business. I would buy a lake house and rent it out as an Air B-n-B when I am not there. I would employ people giving people a chance to learn skills and pay bills. I would donate to animals shelters and food pantries to make the world a better place. I heard of one local animal shelter closing from lack of funds and volunteers. I hope they funraised the $20,000 credit card bill they had. I would have loved to hand over the funds they need to pay their credit card bill but God insists I live in poverty not able to pay my mortgage without hurting my retirement fund.

At the grocery I had $14 to spend from tips. Helped with guest with their luggage cause driver went home early from boredom and people give me tips just for ringing up gift shop purchses. Forced into shuttle duty, but had no rides requested so no tips there. I bought some generic pop tarts, crackers, French bread loaf from the bakery, peanut butter, and margarine. Peanut butter and margarine I will use to make oatmeal cookies and cereal bars. I got flour, sugar, vegetable oil, and spices. Better use it to make food cause I have no more money for groceries until I get my mortgage paid. Hopefully next week I can get all the things on my grocery list.