Clinging to hope

Sad day, the 2 houses I wanted to view this week got sold yesterday. But, received new listings from realtor friend and hopeful to see 1 house like before it gets sold. It's beautiful and spacious going by the photographs. It's in my sister's old neighborhood (she was there for over 10 years and moved b/c the school district didn't teach computers at the elementary school level). I'm so excited and crossing fingers. At one house viewing, I told my niece and nephew that if my basement was big enough I would get a pool table. I don't think they ever played pool so they must learn. I grew up with my brother's pool table in the basement (and broke the bridge when I was about 7 so had to learn weird positions to hit the ball). I taught them how to play chess once. Have to see if nephew remembers when we go on vacation. I'm visiting relatives so don't have to pay for a hotel. I know we will find things to do.

Another work day

Working hard to get work done and get hit with another baby dream. I'm getting so tired of these dreams, just wish the guy in them would just show up in my life. So anyway, dream of bringing home a newborn baby boy from the hospital. Snow is on the ground and we missed a snowstorm while I was in the hospital. Nobody is home cause kids are at school. Kind of weird in my dreams the guy has custody and ex wife gets visitation, but then again these dream stepsons are teenagers so probably pulled away emotional from mama when puberty hit. Set baby down for a nap after his lunch and my guy gets frisky. He has been so lonely since I went away to the hospital, apparently I was there for nearly a week. We have a cuddle and I enjoy the frisky attention. It was a good dream.

We are getting a new coworker next week and I'm on vacation so have to wait to meet them. I'm certain dream guy will not be my pending coworker cause my dream guy is not an accountant.

Memorial Day outing

Visited the cemeteries and saw a new tombstone for my cousin along with my aunt and uncle names next to hers my grandparents' stone. Guess family wanted a place to remember my cousin who was cremated years ago and ashes spread in another state.

Visited my furbabies in foster care waiting for me to buy a new house. I'm trying, but low cost houses are not well kept (that's why they are cheap). Looking for a low cost house I can handle. I want my furbabies back.

Had an angel decoration sitting on top of my bookcase fall to the floor. Some people think it's a sign from someone. Wonder what the message I'm suppose to receive, Angel fell from heaven to earth to be with me? Reminded me of a poem I wrote once:

My best friend gone for eternity

What will become of me

Who will hold my hand

When I can no longer stand

Where is my angel to hold me tight

I will I get through each night

My cries, no one hears

And nobody sees my tears

Where is my angel for bad and for worse

I'm a shaky boat on an unknown course

Where is my angel mama promised me

I need one now can't you see

Where is my angel before it's too late

How much longer must I wait

A hug good-bye is not enough

Moving on is very tough

Where is my angel is wipe away every tear

My angel is far from here

Got the car checked

Got off work early so took the car in for an inspection before my vacation. Don't want to break down in the middle of nowhere. Mechanic inspected everything and only changed a bulb in the turning signal. I can live with that.

Having people coming over to help pack up my stuff. I haven't bought a house yet and I have people ready to pack me up. Hope I find a good home soon, I want my ferrets back. They are safe in foster care. Foster family just took in a baby squirrel. They took video of squirrel meeting ferrets. They are scaredy ferrets.

Manager hired someone will start in a couple weeks. Still looking for more workers and said they want to interview more people before deciding on taking on anymore. The pressure is on us to make up the work lost by loosing 3 coworkers last week. We work as fast as we can.

Well, not much to report this week.

Another day, another dream

Doing my work and suddenly hear carousal music playing my head. Funny, coworkers wear headphones so never hear their music. Brush it off and the vision starts. I'm walking down the local amusement park main street shops area with the carousal playing in the background. I'm holding hands with a very handsome man and note there is a ring on my engagement hand. We are with 2 teenage boys lagging behind being goofy. My niece and nephew are there too. Niece is very attached to me since she is with new people. She grabs my other hand and nephew starts to walk funny like other boys. Niece thinks she should pick all the rides. I tell her maybe I'll win her a stuffed toy.

Next I'm at the skee ball area and present a stuffed toy to my niece. We walk away toward the food stands and meet up the boys. Some lady sees me with my man and asks how long we have been married. I say, " A week". Lady congratulates us saying we resemble an old married couple and walks away. My man comments how we have been together a month and already we look like an old married couple. I explain it's the ring, it has wedding band attached to the diamond ring. Niece asks why I said we were married a week when we got engaged a week ago. My reply, Everybody doesn't need to know everything.

And to end the dream, we leave the park and kids get along goofing around. Niece seems more comfortable around the new people.

Someone I know got scammed

It finally happened, someone I know got scammed out of a bunch of money they will never get back. Their reason: They seemed nice and insistent I give them money. Please watch out for people you care about.

Hits just keep coming

Hand off didn't go as plan. Cage was too heavy so took the lid off. Carried furbabies to car and Luthien got loose. She was under my car, then another car. Then I lost her. I screamed her name for half a hour and wouldn't come to me. Anyway, Eowyn and Boromir are with foster mother today. I was planning on cleaning for landlord's inspection, but now looking for a ferret for a hour. PS.OMG, Knock on the door and it is a woman with Luthien. She just showed up on her porch and her father the maintenance guy told her I was missing a ferret. Must have seen the shirts outside I put out so Luthien could catch my scent and find her way home. My neighbor lived across the courtyard. I offered a reward and she refused it. Apparently Luthien was filthy so she got another bath. Thank you God, I've been praying all day.

Hit with Another Curve Ball

Gave the ferrets a bath and cleaning their cage for the foster family tomorrow. I asked for help looking at houses from family and some are freaking out how I can't buy a house cause I have no what I'm doing. I never owned a house so I should not ever buy one you know. That's why I asked for advice, I know my own limitations. I don't know much about cars either and trust my mechanic to fix it for me (since it runs so I'm happy). I know this sudden, but it's a new home or dispose of the ferrets. I didn't get my ferrets to throw them away when life got hard. I got a mortgage loan, I just need the house. I got my realtor friend, my Mom, my sister, and brother-in-law looking at the next possible house. I'm sure if they have concerns, they will be voiced. My heart is breaking giving my furbabies to someone else cause we will be separated. I can visit and will get them back, but it still hurts. I just don't need extra stress of fighting with my whole family how incompetent I am in the world. I had hard times before and will have them again. The soft words of "You will survive" is what I want to hear.

Thought had time, but no

Since it has been a week since I dropped off my notice asking for patience to close on a house. Get a call today from landlord giving me 7 days to find ferrets a new home or face a 7 day eviction notice on my door. Contacted a kennel facility who will take in my ferrets for $50 a day, so $3000 for 2 months. I have a realtor friend and former work friend living 30 miles away contacting places to help me find home my ferrets are allowed to live in. Praying hard tonight they succeed. Please heavenly father let me find a new home.

PS. Former work friend talked to her friend at a shelter that has a program for people in crisis in need of shelter for their pets with intention of animals being returned. So the ferrets will be in foster care until I find a new home for us. I hope it will be soon.

Happy Mother's Day

Happy Mother's Day to all the mothers, stepmothers, adoptive mothers, foster mothers, pet mothers, mother figures, and single fathers playing the part of mother. Granted I never gave birth to any children, but why should I sit here feeling sorry for myself. My pets' Mother's Day gift was waking me up at 6:30 AM for a cuddle. Nothing like the feeling of fur against your skin. I'll take it. Gave my Mom a lawn chair for her present. She is always borrowing mine or my sister's chair when we go places so she now can stop doing that. Had a buffet lunch at Bonaza with my two sisters, our mother, 2 brother-in-laws, my aunt, my niece, and nephew. Niece and nephew were tortured with talking to their relatives instead of playing on their Kindles. Such as life. Now working on laundry. Had a good day talking to everybody.

House tours

If anyone wants to be my hero, here's your chance.

Need a new home or at least a new home for my ferrets and only 2 people lift a finger to help me. My realtor friend showed me and my Mom who is supplying half the down payment 2 houses today. Didn't really like either one, pet safety issues and narrow driveways. Never realized so many houses don't have dishwashers or showers. Realtor friend is having trouble finding a house in my price range with fencing to keep furbabies safe. I need a fence in case my cats or ferrets escape out the door, they could get hit by a car if nothing is there to stop them. Better luck next viewing.

New fish and still praying for a new home

Got a new red female Beta fish I named Nyx.

Realtor friend is still looking for a new home us. At least I got someone who cares on my side. Most people only want happy news, so naturally I don't look for comfort from them and expect them to keep their distance when I'm stressed. Some days I can't be actor for them. I know it's my fault for animals so much. Squirrels outside will eventually stop receiving peanuts. Praying for a miracle. Wish me luck.

RIP Rhea

RIP Rhea. My new red female Beta died suddenly. She wasn't even full grown yet, more like a teenager. Hope this is not a bad omen.

Sigh of Relief

Realtor friend is helping me find a new home for us. Her lender approved a loan so just need a home to move into. Explained I don't have to live in the same big city I work in, plus I grew up in a small town so I can move into a small town if the price is right. I'm flexible. I just want to keep my furbabies together. I didn't get them to throw them away when life gets hard. With my loan secured, I breathe a sigh of relief cause I have hope.

Choice between my furbabies or find a new home

It finally has happened...Four years in the making. My new baby Boromir escaped out the door and neighbor called the apartment manager. Now I must choose between finding a new home for the ferrets and finding a new home for all of us (2 cats, 3 ferrets, and 4 Beta fish). I am praying for a miracle, though with my luck miracles don't happen. Not to me anyway. I need a hero so badly. SOS.